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other side so I’m straddling it. I’m ready to get out of here and my hand hurts like a bitch, shooting pains flying up the length of my arm. He gently takes my hand in his to examine it.
    “It’s not broken , but it’s definitely going to bruise,” he states matter of fact.
    “Are you a doctor?” I ask. I know you all realize his profession is not that of a doctor, although I’d prefer that over what he actually is. At this point, I wish he was a stranger. Just a nobody like all the rest. But something feels different about him. It’s not love or anything like that, I’m not capable. But it’s definitely a deep infatuation. A fondness that I feel that I haven’t felt for another in a long time. He makes me feel safe.
    “Definitely not.” He laughs. “But I play one on T.V.” He says this seriously and I start laughing so hard I nearly fall off the bike. I slap my hand down unconsciously like a dumb ass. I grit my teeth and draw in a deep breath. Breccan says nothing. Surprisingly, he doesn’t laugh at my stupidity. He puts the helmet on my head and hops on the bike before I can say a word. He speeds off with a jerk. When we pull up at the hospital, I freak the fuck out. I hold my hand tightly to my body and bite my lip until I draw blood. I refuse to look like a big baby right now. I just can’t fucking do this. I don’t want to be here.
    “No. I’m fine. Leave. Now ,” I say in between tense breaths.
    “You should be seen by a doctor. Seriously, babe. It’s probably just bruised, but I’d feel better knowing for sure.” And the heart goes thump-thump.  Even the cruelest bitch on the planet is swooning right now. Maybe that bitch is me.
    “I said I’m fine. Now let’s go. This date is over.” I’m so serious right now. An ice pack and some alcohol should do the trick. I know my hand will be black and blue tomorrow and I’m ok ay with that. As long as I’m not forced to delve into my past and hatred of this place that’s supposed to help people.
    “I don’t like this.” He’s pissed off, I can tell by his tone. Reluctantly he starts his lady back up and off we go. The cool air blowing on my face feels good enough to almost forget the pain. He wastes little time getting back to my place. When he pulls to a stop, I hop off with no help from him. I take the helmet off and fling it to the ground like the bitch I am and storm inside. He doesn’t follow. I think by now he knows I’m trouble. I give the finger to the door as I sit brusquely on my bed. The scowl on my face matches the rage I feel inside. This could have gone a lot better. I’m pissed off at Breccan and I don’t even really know why. I guess I just wanted him to follow me. I just want someone to follow me and fucking mean it.
     

     
     
     
     
     
     
     
    Chapter Six
     
    Date 3
     
    Date number three. Not much to say because it didn’t fucking happen. You read that right. Breccan bitched out. He must not be able to handle me. I can’t say I blame him. I am a firecracker. The things I could have done to him, though. He would have loved to fucking hate me. A small, miniscule, teeny-weeny little part of me wants to trip the fuck out. Scream, break things, and wish that I could go back in time and make him fuck me when I had the chance. I would have straddled him in his sleep. No way in hell would he have resisted then. But now I can’t do a damn thing but wait. Sit here and fucking wait. My mind is racing. I pick up my purse and place it in my lap. The weight feels like a comfort blanket to me and all feels semi-well in the world. I try to smile. I try to smirk. I try to feel anything at all. But nothing. I can’t be happy about this, any of this. The thoughts in my head actually make me sick to my stomach and I lurch the contents of my stomach all over the floor. I quickly call the lobby and have them send someone up to clean it. There’s a helpline for the condos to call for housekeeping, the kitchen, and