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just occurred. As I sat down, I laid my head on the steering wheel to calm my thoughts. Getting everything out of my head for a short moment so I could focus on the drive back to the apartment. The one place I didn’t want to be anymore, only I needed to get my shit together before I made any rash decisions. Hopefully, my dad would have some words of wisdom when I got back because I was fresh out. Nothing I thought or did made any sense. Only when it came to Grace did I have any rational thoughts left. With this craziness off of my chest, I could figure out what happened next. Where our lives would lead us to.

Chapter 4
    A fter getting back home , my dad didn’t have much to say. He left me to figure things out on my own, telling me to call him when I’d found a resolution. Hell, for the past week I’d been wracking my brain on what I needed to do. My day to day had changed because now it was all on me. Dressing, feeding, taking and picking up, bathing, and putting my sweet angel to sleep. All my responsibility. I realized just how much I’d taken Mackenzie for granted. Just how much she actually did. But I wouldn’t change this part of my life.
    We were adjusting.
    Well, I was.
    Grace wasn’t.
    The day I got back from the doctor, the only word she wanted to speak was Momma. The questioning look in her eyes killed me. How did you explain to a two-year-old that her mom wasn’t coming back? The answer was I couldn’t. Instead, I took the coward way out. Telling her every excuse under the sun about where her mom was. Only she would just ask again the next morning as soon as she woke up. I’d ran out of excuses and chose to change the subject on something she enjoyed doing. On where we were going. As long as I acted excited so did she. I was thankful that she ran with what I was doing instead of demanding an answer like she usually did. The nights were the worst. The way she sniffled and looked around for someone who wasn’t there. The way she’d watch the door until it was time to go to bed killed me even more. There’s no way she’d understand she wasn’t coming home. Not yet at least. And by the time she would be, her little mind wouldn’t remember her. Or at least I hoped she wouldn’t.
    The memory of last night was still on the forefront of my mind as I made my cup of coffee and sat down at the table. I’d barely gotten away from Grace when I’d woken up. Thinking back to the events from last night, I shivered.
    She’d been in such a bad mood all day and getting her to sleep was even worse. She stomped her feet, demanding I get her mommy. When I said I couldn’t, she threw herself on the bedroom floor and wailed. In that moment, if it were legal to kill someone, I would’ve. She’d broken my little girl’s heart and there was nothing I could do but pick her up and rock her back and forth until her little body passed out from the exhaustion of her tears. When I tried to lay her down, she grabbed my shirt and whimpered, causing tears of my own to fall. She’d never been a clinger. Always loved her own space. Only she wouldn’t let go of me. When I tried to open her hand, her fingers grew tighter and I stopped attempting to break her grasp. Instead, I wrapped my arms around her back, walked into my bedroom, and broke my own rule. That night, I laid in my bed with my daughter in my arms, and stared at the ceiling as I listened to her soft breaths. Every now and then she’d hiccup and clench my shirt. She’d calm back down when I rubbed soft circles on her back, letting her know I was still there. My eyes grew heavy so I tried to move her off of me, but she still wasn’t having it. That right there broke my heart completely. The action also solidified my decision. I’d gain full custody of my daughter, get all my plans in motion for the opening of my own shop, and we were going to the place where Grace should’ve grown up all along. My hometown. I couldn’t do it to her anymore. I needed my