Brilliant

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Book: Read Brilliant for Free Online
Authors: Roddy Doyle
Ben.”
    â€œThe Black Dog’s been on his back.”
    â€œI didn’t see him on Uncle Ben’s back,” Gloria whispered. “Did you, Rayzer?”
    â€œNo.”
    It upset them. It was horrible. The Black Dog of Depression definitely wasn’t a nice dog, and he’d been climbing onto their uncle’s back. They didn’t know what the Black Dog did then—lickedUncle Ben with his horrible tongue or whispered horrible things into Uncle Ben’s ear. They didn’t know. They’d only just heard about the Dog.
    They both shivered.
    â€œWe have to do something,” said Raymond—he whispered.
    â€œWhat?”
    â€œGet the funny bone back from the Black Dog,” Raymond whispered.
    â€œYeah,” Gloria agreed—she whispered too. “It’ll cheer up Uncle Ben and make him better again.”
    â€œLet’s go.”
    â€œHang on,” said Gloria. “What’s a funny bone?”
    â€œIt’s the bit of the body that makes you laugh,” said Raymond. “You know the way the heart is where your blood goes and the lungs are where your air goes?”
    â€œYeah.”
    â€œWell,” Raymond whispered, “the funny bone’s where the laughs are stored, before you use them.”
    â€œAnd the Black Dog wants to rob Uncle Ben’s funny bone?”
    â€œNot sure,” said Raymond. “Think so.”
    â€œSo Uncle Ben can’t laugh.”
    â€œYeah,” said Raymond. “Or even smile—without trying really hard.”
    Gloria nodded. It all made sense. She’d seen her Uncle Ben trying to smile.
    â€œAnd does Dublin have a funny bone as well?” she whispered.
    â€œGranny said so,” said Raymond.
    â€œAh, well, then,” said Gloria.
    She trusted her granny, and it still made sense. No one in the city seemed to laugh anymore. No teachers, or any of the other adults she knew.
    â€œLet’s go,” said Raymond.
    â€œNow, like?”
    â€œYeah.”
    â€œOkay.”
    Gloria ran to the back door—it was the nearest way out—but Raymond ran to the other door, the one their dad had closed a few minutes before.
    Gloria was confused.
    â€œWhere are we going, Rayzer?” she whispered.
    â€œUpstairs, to get our clothes on.”
    â€œOh yeah,” Gloria whispered. “I forgot.”
    They were still in their jammies. They’d no shoes or socks on, or anything. She laughed—quietly.
    â€œThere’s nothing wrong with my funny bone, Rayzer,” she whispered.
    They crept out into the hall and went quietly back up the stairs. They crept into Raymond’s bedroom. They didn’t turn on the light. The click of the switch would have been too loud. They took off their pajamas and put on proper clothes. They didn’t sit on the bed, so the bedsprings wouldn’t creak or squeal. They crept back out to the landing. They went back down the stairs, very carefully over the loose nail in the second-to-last step. They shut the kitchen door again, carefully, quietly.
    They sat on the floor and put on their shoes.
    â€œWill we bring our coats?”

    â€œI hate my coat.”
    â€œMe too.”
    Raymond was unlocking the back door, about to step into the night.
    The door was open now. The new cold air was all around them.
    â€œWhere are we going, Rayzer?” Gloria asked.
    â€œDon’t know,” said Raymond.
    He gulped—it was dark out there.
    He took a big breath.
    â€œBut we have to find the Black Dog,” he said. “And he’s not in here. So come on.”
    They ran out into the back garden. The security light fromO’Leary’s house next door went on, with a click and a blast of white light.
    â€œOh my God!”
    â€œCome on!”
    Raymond led the way to the side of the house. It was cold, and there was a smell of old trash bin. O’Leary’s security light clicked off.
    Raymond stopped.
    â€œI

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