courtyard.’
‘There are many. Also a fashion is ruin bars – in old buildings, falling down almost.’
‘I suppose the ground rent wouldn’t be much.’
‘No, but in a year, they get knocked down, new shopping mall takes over.’ He shrugged and nodded at the bartender before ordering something typically unidentifiable. We retired to the courtyard with two small glasses of something that looked treacly and vile.
‘What is this?’ I took a sniff. It smelled herbal and a bit tannic and a lot undrinkable.
‘Unicum. Is strong to clear your head.’
‘Clear my head? I think it might do the opposite.’
Somewhere amidst the Tokaj fug in my brain, a thought occurred to me. ‘Hey.’ I leant forward, jabbing him semi-accurately in the upper arm. ‘You aren’t trying to get me drunk are you? So you can take advantage of me?’
A part of me wanted him to say yes. A part of me wanted to answer, ‘OK, go ahead.’
But his moustache bristled and he sat back, studiedly casual. ‘I try to show you Hungarian culture is all.’
Hmm, he was a pricklier character than I thought in some ways. He seemed to lurch from full-on seducer to cool customer and back again without ever giving any indication which mode he was in. It reminded me of why I found men and relationships irritating, so I simply raised my eyebrows and took a sip of the noxious beverage.
‘Christ,’ I spluttered. ‘That’s foul. It’s like some Victorian medicine that’s been left in a cabinet since 1862.’
His frozen demeanour relaxed and he grinned with amusement. ‘It is not your taste? OK, I get you something else. Pálinka? Beer? Wine?’
‘Anything.’
He came back from the bar with another bottle of wine and two glasses. ‘Tell me what you like,’ he said, pouring the rich red liquid.
‘Haven’t we had that conversation?’
‘No, what you like in a man.’
‘I don’t want a man.’
Apart from you.
‘No, but if a man fell down to the Earth who was perfect, what is he like?’
A bit like you.
‘Oh, you know, I don’t think I’ve given it much thought.’
‘You think about it now. Tell me.’
‘I used to have a list and Dave ticked all the boxes. My list was: caring, sensible, ambitious, good with money, loyal, faithful, optimistic, steady.’
The look of disgust on János’ face made me laugh. ‘What?’
‘This is business partner you describe. Not lover. What about, I don’t know, what about he make you laugh? English always talk about your sense of humour, I think. You don’t want that?’
I pondered. There hadn’t ever been a lot of laughs in our household, now I came to think of it. ‘I suppose it would be a nice extra.’
‘Extra? What about he is good lover? That is extra also?’
‘I don’t … really know.’
‘What about he is loving? He will do anything for you?’
‘Oh, Dave was loving. In his way. He wouldn’t have fought a fire-breathing dragon or anything but …’
‘I will fight a dragon. I will do that for my woman.’ János’ fist banged down on the table.
I blinked. ‘And what about this woman? What would she be like?’
He put his head on one side and looked at me for long enough to make me shiver and take refuge in my drink.
‘I don’t know this Dave,’ he said at length. ‘He is not like me. I am maybe opposite personality. Before you give up, before you forget about men, don’t you want to try a different personality? How do you know if you don’t want it, if you don’t try it?’
‘Do you think life is like that?’ I asked quietly. ‘A big experiment? Try everything once? It’s not like that for me. I have feelings. I have a heart and I can’t risk having it broken.’
‘Oh, you see, now we have it. You are afraid. Afraid of love.’
‘Have you ever been in love?’
‘Oh yes, of course.’
‘Lots of times, I bet. Love ‘em and leave ’em. I bet you’re that type.’ My speech was starting to slur. I’d drained the fishbowl-sized wine