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front of the TV.
    “Hey, y’all. I was afraid I’d need to come in there with a fire hose soon so you don’t miss your plane.”
    “Liar. You’ve never been afraid of anything in your life,” I say, walking over and pecking him on the cheek.
    “You look mahvelous, my dear. Something about you is positively glowing,” he says. I blush, as he knew I would. Derek stays quiet – always a smart move around Jeremy.
    “I’m going to miss you. Take care of the place, hmm?” I say.
    “You betcha, baby,” he says, but he sounds melancholy.
    “Is everything okay?” I ask with a glance at my watch.
    “Oh, just more drama. My life sucks. Nothing really new.”
    “I’m so late. I have to go. But I’ll call you from the airport,” I promise.
    He waves a limp hand. “No need. Go do what you have to do.” He looks at Derek with a raised eyebrow. “You staying here to keep me company, gorgeous?”
    Derek shakes his head. “Off to the airport.”
    “Probably just as well. You look all worn out,” Jeremy says, smirking.
    Derek ignores the comment and we move to the door.
    “Bye, Jeremy,” I say.
    “ Ciao, bella . Safe travels,” he says, and then we’re in the hall, making for the stairs.
    The cab driver breaks about a hundred speed laws on the way to the airport, but I’m still worse than late. Derek kisses me for a half minute on the curb outside the terminal, and when I detach from him there’s a lump in my throat the size of an apple. I swore I wouldn’t cry when we parted, and I almost make it, only a single tear crawling down my cheek as I push into the massive building amidst a throng of rushing humanity.
    I show my ID, swipe and push buttons and swear I’m not a terrorist, wait in a serpentine line that crawls at a snail’s pace, watch as bored guards study my bag and shoes as they trundle through the security scanner, and then I’m running for the gate, hair flying everywhere.
    When I arrive, the attendant is making the final boarding call, and I’m gasping as I hurry down the Jetway, the flight attendants watching me disapprovingly. It’s a full flight, and of course there’s no room in the overhead compartment for my backpack, so I wind up stuffing it under the seat in front of me, cutting my legroom down to prison size for the five-hour flight.
    I strap in as the engines wind up. As we push back from the gate, everyone but me is reading or watching the security film that pretends if we plunge thirty-something thousand feet that we’ll walk away from it as long as our seatbelts are fastened.
    The big plane accelerates, and I’m pushed back into the seat, the pit of my stomach against my spine, and soon we’re soaring into the sky, mysterious clanking thunks and whirring whines coming from the wings as we leave the city’s skyline behind us. I’m replaying the prior night with Derek in my mind again and again as we climb to cruising altitude, and suddenly I’m tired, the lack of sleep catching up to me. My last thought as I drift off is that with all the hubbub at the airport, I never called Jeremy.
    I jolt awake as we approach LAX, dropping into a sprawling beige carpet of smog pierced by a few shining towers glinting in the sun. The stewardess is standing beside me, warning me to put my seat back up and prepare for landing. I remove my shades, rub my eyes, and do as I’m told, and then peer out the window. Five hours of my life I’ll never get back, but at least I feel better.
    My fingers brush my lips and a wave of melancholy washes over me. They’re still tingling from all the kissing. Or maybe it’s just my imagination. Either way, this long weekend has changed my life. I feel both overwhelmed, and anxious, because I know that there’s nobody in the world for me but Derek – and there’s a whole country between us, and now an ex with a baby waiting in the wings.
    The jet’s tires bounce on the runway, and we slow before taxiing to the terminal. I wait until the crowd has