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though. The more you explain why, the more leverage the other person has, which he or she can use to manipulate you into changing that no into a yes .
    Boundaries mean that you teach people what you will and won’t accept in the relationship. They can be a lot of work, but that’s what it takes to build a healthy relationship with yourself and others.
    Respect your right to schedule your time. Don’t allow others to dictate your schedule to you. For instance, you have the right to not answer the phone or doorbell when it rings, and to not feel obligated to immediately answer e-mails or social-media posts. If someone asks you to drop everything to drive him or her across town, you have the right to say no. It’s like the adage “Lack of planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on my part.” We must overcome impulsive rescuing tendencies, unless it’s an actual emergency and we feel internally guided to help.
    Source Is the Only Source
    A lot of people use guilt to manipulate others into getting their way. They also include flattery mixed with guilt. So, as an example, they’ll say, “Only you can help me; and if you don’t help me, there will be horrible consequences for me.”
    As a sensitive Earth Angel, you don’t want anyone to suffer, so you allow the other person’s words to manipulate and control you. Then you feel weak and used, as well as resentful and angry. Add to this the frustration that arises because you’ve backtracked on your promise to take excellent care of yourself . . . and you’ve got a heap of toxic energies inside your mind, emotions, and body.
    It’s so important to remind yourself that every person has the same Source: God . Those who play with your emotions to get their way are creations of God, just like you and everyone else. You’re not their God, nor are you their Source. So, allow Source God to be each person’s caretaker. Pray for guidance about how you can truly help others gain strength and be self-sufficient.
    Of course, there will be instances where you’re acting as an Earth Angel and bringing forth God’s help through your efforts. But those instances are clearly guided by love, not by guilt.
    If you’re giving because of guilt, it’s not true or pure giving, as was discussed in the previous chapter. Your gift out of guilt is tainted with toxic energies.
    Healthy Boundaries
    Boundaries are a form of self-care. When you uphold your boundaries, meaning that you don’t allow others to manipulate, guilt, or control you, your inner self applauds and thanks you.
    Your self-esteem and confidence increase whenever you successfully stand up for yourself.
    Now, by “stand up for yourself,” I don’t mean that you’re aggressively pronouncing judgments over others. Remember that assertiveness upholds everyone’s rights: yours and those of the other person involved. When you maintain your boundaries and say no with grace, love, and firmness, you teach people how to handle boundaries.
    You’re not their Source; God is! If you make yourself their Source, then how will they ever learn to support themselves and grow?
    When I was first teaching angel courses, I made time to sit down personally one-on-one with each student. During these individual sessions, I’d tune in to the student’s angels and answer all of the questions that he or she had. And then I’d go home and be ill and tired for two to three days after the workshop; I had allowed myself to become drained, under the misguided notion that I was the one to help and serve all these students.
    After that, I realized that I wasn’t doing myself or them any favors by being so accessible. I realized that it was important for me to model good healthy boundaries to my students, many of whom were in training to become spiritual teachers themselves. I needed to teach each student how to access Divine guidance and