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beyond. She remembered the sound of Samantha’s gasp as her husband’s strap had struck her buttocks while witnesses watched, no one batting an eye, as if it were completely normal. She heard again the echo of that one tear as it dropped onto the floor.
    A deep longing consumed her.
    She checked her watch. It was a little after one in the afternoon. Michael would be home by six tonight. She went up to their shared office and sat down behind the desk, opening her laptop. She fished out Kyan’s business card from its hiding place, her heart racing at the thought of what she was about to do, even though she had to do it. This wasn’t something that was going to leave her alone.
    Dear Kyan,
    I have been thinking of writing you, but to be honest, just wasn’t sure what to say. I very much appreciated you taking me under your wing and helping me at the club. I think I would have gone running if you hadn’t.
    I would like to come back, but I suppose I’m afraid. I want to experience what I saw; I’m just not sure I can actually go through with it. I’m not looking for a sexual relationship; things are… complicated. I’m confused to say the least. I don’t know why I want this, why I can’t just let it go. I want to let it go, I want it to let me go. Is that even possible?
    Sophie
    She was sweating by the time she read it over for the hundredth time and forced herself to hit send, listening to the swoosh as it left her mailbox, still wondering if she’d done the right thing or if she was crossing a line.
    She shut down her computer and stood. What was she doing? What did she want? What did she expect from Kyan?
    Downstairs, she put on her coat, grabbed her purse, and headed out to the market. She needed to buy food for dinner tonight and while she was out, maybe she’d pick up a new set of cufflinks for Michael. She’d barely returned home when her phone signaled a new e-mail had arrived.
    Forcing herself to wait until she was at least inside the house, she dropped the bags on the counter and looked at the new message on her phone. It was a simple one, just a few sentences.
    Sophie, I’m at the club now doing some paperwork. Why don’t you come by and we can talk. I’m alone and we can just talk. Front door is unlocked.
    Kyan.
    Her heart raced. She checked her watch, just after two. Four hours before Michael would get home. It would take her fifteen minutes to get there; she’d have plenty of time. At least she wouldn’t have to worry about clothing if the club was closed. They’d just talk. Maybe he could help her figure this out.
    Putting the salmon into the refrigerator and the ice cream in the freezer, she went back out the door.
    The club looked different during the day, just like a normal house—like her house must look from the outside. It made her wonder what happened behind the closed doors of all other seemingly ‘normal’ looking houses.
    It was a sunny day, which meant every outdoor table was taken at the cafés even though it was early April and still quite cold in the city. She scanned the crowds as she quickly made her way up the stairs and opened the door to enter the club.
    “Sophie,” Kyan said, looking up from his seat at the front desk.
    “Hi,” she said, closing the door behind her. The inside also looked different in the daytime. He’d drawn a curtain aside where she hadn’t realized there was a window and sunshine poured through it. Again, nothing scary about the place. Not what she’d expected before she’d finally collected enough courage to walk inside.
    Kyan shut off his computer and stood.
    “Come in.” He came round the desk. “I’m glad you contacted me,” he said, reaching to greet her with the customary three kisses on her cheeks.
    The touch of his face against hers was light, but it still made her shiver.
    “I was just going to get some coffee. Would you like some?” he asked.
    She nodded. “Yes, that would be great.” They were just going to drink coffee;