Yolo

Read Yolo for Free Online

Book: Read Yolo for Free Online
Authors: Lauren Myracle
maddie:
yeah, and that’s why I’m texting you, which takes the exact same amount of time. FAULTY LOGIC, SISTER.
mad maddie:
I do feel self-conscious around Zara. seriously. but I’m going out with her tonight anyway, so there.
mad maddie:
what the hell is swoo-swoo?
SnowAngel:
I am! I iz a sexy swoo-swoo bitch, that’s what I iz! I found a Pinterest board on how to create casual beach waves using a straight iron, and I nailed it. I am a mermaid goddess!
mad maddie:
when you say “I am a mermaid” . . .
mad maddie:
this isn’t another one of those dress-up parties, is it?
SnowAngel:
now, Maddie. does a date party sound to you like a “come as a mermaid” party?
mad maddie:
yes? no? I know not the ways of you crazy sorority girls!
SnowAngel:
you make me giggle, and no, I’m not dressing up as a mermaid, tho that’s a good one to keep in mind for the car wash we’re hosting tomorrow.
SnowAngel:
*taps chin* hrrm, where to find a good clamshell bra . . . ?
SnowAngel:
tonight I’m wearing skinny jeans and my vintage vest with tassels, which sounds horrid in concept but is, in reality, extremely awesome and makes my boobs look fantastico.
mad maddie:
ah
SnowAngel:
wanna know who my date is?
mad maddie:
yes
mad maddie:
of course
mad maddie:
I am dying to know
SnowAngel:
yr saying that in a robot voice, aren’t u?
mad maddie:
why no I am not whatever in the world wld make u think that hashtag liarpants hashtag starwarsdroid hashtag geeksrule
SnowAngel:
*glares*
SnowAngel:
his name’s Todd, he’s hot, and he’s an Iota, duh, since the Iotas are hosting the party.
mad maddie:
oh, yeah, duh. absolutely.
SnowAngel:
a Zeta named Beth set me up with him. she was like, “He talks about football too much, but he’s a total catch. He’s good in bed and he LOVES oral—and I’m not talking about you going down on him. I’m talking him going down on you.”
mad maddie:
wow
mad maddie:
that’s, ah, a lot to take in. or—ha!—I guess it’s NOT a lot to take in, if what that Beth girl says is true.
SnowAngel:
heh?
SnowAngel:
oh. good lord, Maddie. u r just . . .
SnowAngel:
erggh! no taking in! not boy/girl OR girl/boy.
SnowAngel:
have u . . . er . . . taken in Ian?
mad maddie:
why did the Beth girl pass Todd off on you if he’s such a catch?
SnowAngel:
is that a yes? taking that as a yes unless you say otherwise . . .
mad maddie:
Angela, of course I’ve given Ian blow jobs. it’s nobig deal, except that eventually yr jaw starts to hurt.
SnowAngel:
a tip to remember. gotcha.
mad maddie:
well, der! the tip’s the most sensitive part! licky like a lolly and give yr jaw a break!
SnowAngel:
Oh. My. God. so gross.
SnowAngel:
I’m off to pre-party. a bunch of us are meeting in the kitchen for tequila shots so that when we get to the party we’ll already have a buzz on.
mad maddie:
once upon a time, *I* was the one who was considered the wild child. seems hard to believe now, doesn’t it?
SnowAngel:
SnowAngel:
have fun with the Esbees!
    Fri, Sept 27 , 11:59 PM E . D . T .
SnowAngel:
ohhhh, Zooooeeeeee!
SnowAngel:
I am drunkie.come play with meeeeeee!
zoegirl:
I would, but *I* am tucked snugly in my bed, reading “My Family and Other Animals.” it’s awesome.
SnowAngel:
is it about aniamals?
SnowAngel:
*animals
SnowAngel:
I like animals!
SnowAngel:
SnowAngel:
I’m a chicken! mooooooooo!
zoegirl:
it’s about a kid who lives in Greece and all of his adventures. makes me want to go.
SnowAngel:
zoegirl:
but earlier I made the bold move of going out to dinner WITH STRANGERS. well, not strangers, but a guy and a girl from my creative writing class. Holly and Gannon.
SnowAngel:
I did something with strangers too!!!!
SnowAngel:
well, ONE stranger.
SnowAngel:
my asshole date ditched me, so I got him back by kissing a verrrrrry cute boy named . . .
zoegirl:
. . .

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