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he had pushed away his family and severed all ties because he thought he had been validated in his anger—he let one bad thing in his life control and ruin him—it hit way too close to home.
    Joey had been my sponsor for all intents and purposes, and I wasn’t ashamed of that. I'd gotten over the awkwardness of being an addict. It was a part of me, it always would be a part of me, and she had helped me through that. But I'd never had to sit in a room full of people and listen to them mirror their stories with mine about how they'd screwed things up so badly they didn't know if they could ever fix them.
    There wasn't a day that went by that my heart didn't question every move, every decision, every puzzle piece put in place by my actions. And every day since Mamma had sent that note to my friend's house, knowing I'd eventually make my way there and receive it—the note that told me that Mason was getting married at the church in town on New Year's. I hated him, but needed to see it. I needed to see him marry her…because he was still my brother. Back then I hadn't understood it, but now I did. I had hated and loved my brother. I hated that he was happy back then, but now, it gave me hope that I could one day be happy, too.
    I slipped from my chair and wondered how the hell I was going to do this. I couldn't come back here every week if they were going to have a rehash session every time.
    I could feel the beauty's dark eyes on me as I made my way down the side aisle. I couldn't help but look over and get my final look of the girl I'd caught staring at me before walking out of this place and never coming back, but when I turned, she was gone.
    I felt her loss like a shot through my skull.
    I actually felt something . That hadn't happened with anything or anyone in years. Joey didn't count—this was something I hadn't felt since I was a teenager enthralled with the new girl at school. My eyes searched the room for her and came up empty. I sighed and swallowed hard; my revelation, a fresh wound that ached in both bad and good ways.
    I turned and had to reach out and grip the upper arms of the girl, who had been entirely too close for proper etiquette, to keep her from falling.
    The beauty.
    When her mouth opened, her voice skated over my skin, making every vein and muscle perk up to attention.
    "Hey, it's barely even started and you're leaving? You're new, right?" she asked, though I could tell she knew the answer already.
    "I was leaving," I answered truthfully, "but honestly, I think…I've found a reason to stay." My tone and the way my eyes bore into hers left nothing to the imagination. I was absolutely flirting with her. It shocked the hell out of me that I got so much enjoyment out of it. And I enjoyed the blush that crept into her cheeks very much.
    She smiled a little in allowance. "I would think you would have a better reason to stay."
    I felt my lips lift. "Mmm, right now? I don't think so."
    She barely licked her lip and then looked behind me. "There's an empty chair right here in the back. We call this the safe zone . For the commitment-phobes."
    I laughed. "I think I probably qualify. And…where are you sitting?" I asked, but we both knew I knew.
    She smiled and tucked her hair behind her ear. "I stand in the back. I think I'm more of a commitment-phobe than you. Besides, I've done my stint in NA already. Now I'm just here for…moral support. And to keep the phobes from escaping."
    She giggled at her own joke. It was the cutest thing I'd ever seen.
    My mouth said, "Want to compare phobes…over dinner tonight?" I gritted my teeth at myself. I hadn't even been at NA for five minutes and I was already asking a girl out.
    Her breath released slowly. "Addicts aren't really supposed to date other addicts. Besides, are you supposed to be dating right now?" she asked.
    People in AA or NA or anything else weren't supposed to date for years or something. But I wasn't really in NA, or was I? I was just hoping I could