spots us right away, pointing the flashlight in our direction.
“Prince! Meckler! Kinda late for a stroll, dontcha think?” His voice is rough and unfriendly.
Stephanie is a blubbering mess. She and I are holding hands as we walk; I tug her along as I hurry over to Digger.
“Sir, we have to go over to Winchester to see Stephanie’s brother. It’s an emergency.”
Digger is not easily impressed, intimidated, or coerced. He’s the kind of guy who can smoke an unfiltered cigarette all the way down to its nub without once having to take it out of his mouth.
“Uh-huh.” He shines the flashlight in my eyes. “Let’s see those pupils.”
I squint into the light. “They’re not dilated.”
“No, they aren’t.” He sighs, almost disappointed, taking a long drag from his cigarette and exhaling out his nose. “You know what time it is?”
Stephanie is just standing beside me, clutching my hand so tightly that it’s almost numb.
“I know it’s late. I’m sorry—we’ll be fast, I promise.”
He considers. “If your father was to hear about this, and you had to explain this so-called emergency , what would he have to say about it?”
“Pleeease!” Stephanie says. Her tone is uneven and frantic. “I need to see my brother, sir!”
Digger peers at her, shines the flashlight briefly at her pupils. “All right. Make it quick. Don’t let me run into you girls out here at four in the morning.”
Winchester is a one-story dorm, about two hundred feet kitty-corner from our dorm, Ellis House. Because Stonybrook Academy is situated on a hill, even though we’re miles from the beach, the air is moist enough to carry the smells of sand and salt. It’s overwhelming, sensory-wise, holding on to Stephanie’s hand as she trembles, the two of us rapidly approaching Winchester, damp gritty soil working its way into the edges of my sandals as we hurry along in the cool, still night.
Ethan must have known we were coming. His desk is just beneath his window, which is open, and I can tell right away that he’s been crying. I help boost Stephanie into her brother’s room. Ethan wipes his eyes and gives me a sweet, grateful smile. “Thanks, Em. You’re the best, you know that?”
“I’m sorry about your parents.”
He nods, gritting his teeth. “I’m sorry my dad’s an asshole .”
“Ethan, don’t say that.” Stephanie’s arms are around her brother’s neck; for the first time, I notice he’s wearing only a white T-shirt and boxer shorts. Just as the jolt from the sight of him is dissolving, I realize that neither of them seems to have any plans to help me into the room.
“So I guess I’ll just … I can wait out here? Or do you want me to go ahead back, Steph?”
She shakes her head. “Stay. Ethan, can you let her into the common room to wait?”
I meet him at the far end of the building, where there’s a set of double doors locked from the inside. Since Ethan is a prefect, he has a key, so he can let me in. As we’re standing alone in the dark, silent hallway, all of a sudden he puts his arms around my waist and folds me into a tight hug.
The dampness from his eyes and cheeks smears onto my face and neck. He holds me for what feels like a very long time. I hug him back, so aware of his whole body against mine that I can hardly breathe. This is Ethan ; I’ve known him since we were twelve. He’s never acted so affectionate before. To be honest, even though his good looks aren’t exactly a matter of opinion—he’s definitely hot—the whole scenario feels kind of … icky. I mean, Ethan is the brother I never had.
He pulls away like nothing happened. Maybe it didn’t; maybe he’s just so upset about his parents that he needed someone to hold on to. But then he takes my hand —I’m so startled that I almost yank it away without even thinking about it—and leads me to the common room, where the lights are off but the television is on low.
We stand together in the doorway. “I mean