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you’re saving the time for your family or something important to you. If someone really insists, firmly reiterate you can’t do it. Be polite but assertive. This, of course, applies to fellow coworkers. For the boss, you’ll need to try negotiation.
    Negotiate. If your boss presents you with a task you can’t outright refuse, but your plate is undeniably full, don’t hesitate to point this out. Don’t beat around the bush. Openly discuss your current deadlines and workload, and communicateboth honestly and clearly. For example, you might say, “I’m currently working on X, Y, and Z projects. As things stand, I believe this additional project is beyond my capacity at the moment, and I want to return quality work in a timely way. Would you like me to hand it off to someone else, hire a contractor, or would you prefer to reprioritize my existing project load for me?” How you approach this, of course, depends on your circumstances, but it does put the ball back into your manager’s court.
    Meet someone halfway. Sometimes it’s hard to say no to a request, especially when it’s clear someone thinks enough of you to try to tap your expertise. While I feel it’s critical for you to develop the capacity to refuse, you can arrange to meet people halfway and offer alternatives to immediately adding something to your HIT list. For example, you might admit you’re already booked up, but make it clear you’ll do all you can to help. Or, rather than being a committee member, you’ll act in an advisory capacity. Perhaps you can’t drop what you’re juggling right now, but there’s an open spot somewhere ahead in your schedule in a few weeks. Inform the requester you can do the task then, and not now. This solution may satisfy you both if the task isn’t time-critical. If you really want to help with a new task, but you genuinely don’t have the time, be honest and ask if there’s some way you can contribute without going all-in.
    Be persistent and consistent. Some people just won’t take no for an answer and will keep bugging you to take on a task, no matter how many times you refuse them. In a case like this one, you’ll have to respond to their persistence with persistence of your own. Now, I’m not talking about someone who responds to your rejection with a standard statement like, “Aw, are you sure? Well, if you change your mind …” Some people will feel obliged to ask a second time later on; again, this is no big deal if you just say no again. Use this technique with thedysfunctional ones who demand to know why not (see the first tip) or ask over and over, as if they can’t believe you refused them. Don’t let them wear you down.
    Be crystal clear. Be straightforward when turning someone down; say no when you mean no. Don’t couch your rejection in obscure terms or beat around the bush; just say no in a direct way, so you don’t have to repeat yourself because you confused someone. Your answer should be clear to any reasonable person, and you don’t need to argue.
    Don’t worry too much about their feelings. Some people take a turndown as a blow to their self-esteem. This is not your problem. Your goal is to reduce your commitment level, not to help others reduce theirs—and that’s exactly what they’re attempting when they ask you to take on their tasks. Don’t let pity overwhelm your common sense; unless something awful and unfair has happened, you can’t afford to feel sorry for everyone and everything. Just because they’ve let something blow up into a crisis doesn’t mean it’s your crisis—unless you take it on.
You Want a Piece of Me?
    Everyone wants to be the nice person in the office … well, maybe not the curmudgeon over there in the corner. But you can take a cue from him, because he’s not afraid to say no. You can’t be afraid either, or