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put on my finger eleven years before and I take off only while I’m in my studio. Next is the tiny engagement ring he could afford at nineteen, then the sizable diamond eternity band he gave me for our tenth anniversary. We have forged a life together, and without these rings I feel unsettled, like I have left the oven on or forgotten to lock the door on the way to the airport. Being without them heightens the reality of the experience. I am not his wife, not the mother of his children. I am simply his.
    Married sex is the best sex. Married sex is the thrill of meeting for a hook up or a one-night stand in a hotel, but without any of the risk. It’s finding your sexual being again after two kids, a mortgage and payments on cars that smell of stale French fries. Tomorrow morning, before we pick up our children, we will make love in this room as Mr. and Mrs. John Underwood, and it will be good.
    In a few weeks the colors in my head will begin to dull, to clash with one another. Jack will know. One Saturday he’ll half bully, half cajole me into the studio then disappear with the kids. My rings will be in his pocket. He’ll call when I least expect it. I will likely be grasping for clarity through muddy colors and sloppy lines when my cell phone chirps.
    “Meet me at the Embassy Suites bar in an hour,” he’ll say, his familiar voice not quite his own.
    And I will.

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ISBN: 978-1-4268-5152-0
    What She Needs
    Copyright © 2010 by Anne Calhoun
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