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direction. He just stares out the windshield. We pull up in front of the house and I jump out of the car. A moment later I return with my cell in hand.
    “Thanks for driving back. I’m sorry,” I concede.
    Taking his hand in mine I try to soften his mood but my apology falls on deaf ears. He’s really angry. It would be different if we had to turn around for him. He coldly drops my hand and puts the car into reverse. I decide to keep my mouth shut with the hope that we might be able to salvage the night.
    As we pull up to the intersection light a couple of blocks from home, Matt turns to me. His eyes dark and his lips set in a heavy line.“I’m getting sick and tired of your damn job running our lives, Brooke. Things need to change! I won’t keep doing this.” He grips the steering wheel, looking away from me.
    He’s such a child when he’s mad. I’ve had enough of his crap. I’m sick and tired of my job being attacked while he can go off on his so-called business trips at a moments notice. God forbid I make a comment about him being overly friendly with some of the women he works with.
    “You think I enjoy working the hours I work? Do you? The sad thing is, I don’t really have a choice, do I? I’m doing this for the good of our family! You can’t have it both ways, Matt. And you don’t have to do this anymore if you don’t want to. Maybe we should turn around and go back home. I’m not really in a social mood now.” The light changes from red to green and Matt proceeds into the intersection. Unable to keep his temper in check he turns to look at me.
    “Fine. But this discussion is far from ov—”
    BANG!
    Rolling. Lots of rolling.
    Silence.
    Searing pain.
    “Matt … Matt …what happened?” I call out, my voice dry and throaty, but he doesn’t answer. The light in my eyes starts to flicker and soon everything is quiet and dark.
    I wake in the hospital, my mom and dad sitting at my bedside.
    “Mom?” I pause to clear my scratchy throat. “Mom, what happened?”
    “Oh, Brooke …” Tears stream down my mom’s cheeks, but she tries to conceal them by turning her head away from me.
    “Mom?”
    “Brooke, honey…you were in a car accident.” She gets up from the chair beside my bed and walks over to the window. Something is terribly wrong. She isn’t looking at me. Oh, god…why can’t she turn around and look at me? What’s wrong?
    Panic.
    “Mom! Where are Matt and Katelin?”
    My mom erupts into the most pitiful, painful sobs I have ever heard. My dad quickly rushes to her side, trying to get her to sit back down in the chair.
    I know in my soul.
    I know in my soul what has happened without anyone having to say the words.
    My dad walks over to me and takes my hand as he sits down on the edge of my bed and lowers his head.“They’re gone, baby,” he says with a crack in his voice. He wipes a tear from his cheek.
    “Noooooooooooo!” I scream, the sounds so primal I don’t recognize my own voice. I can’t breathe. Can’t get air into my lungs.
    Someone help me.
    “No! Where are they? I want to see them! Where are they? Tell me, dammit! Where’s Katelin? Tell me where my baby is!”
    I want to see my daughter. I need to hold my baby in my arms. I need to tell her I love her more than life itself.
    I need Matt. He’ll make it all better. He’s the strong one. I need to hear him tell me everything will be all right.
    The doctors and nurses have burst into my room. I can’t see anything for the tears, but I feel the pressure of hands trying to hold me down, trying to sedate me.
    “Kill me! Please, kill me!” I beg as they inject the syringe into my arm.“I want to be with them! I don’t want to live! I can’t live without them!”
    Darkness.
     
    “Brooke…Brooke…Wake up, sweetheart.”
    It was only a dream. I’d fallen asleep. But it isn’t a dream. It’s a horrible nightmare etched into my mind that rears its ugly head every time my guard is down.
    “Hey, shhh…it’s