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see, we all make our own sandwiches in this life.” He handed me a brown bag with two sandwiches in it. “Do you want cheese and tomato or tomato and cheese?” he asked, grinning.  
    “Oh, just give me either,” I jested back.  
    As we munched, Socrates said, “When you become fully responsible for your life, you can become fully human; once you become human, you may discover what it means to be a warrior.”  
    “Thanks, Soc, for the food for thought, and for belly.” I bowed grandly. Then I put on my jacket and got ready to leave. “I won't be by for a couple of weeks. Finals are coming up. And I also have some hard thinking to do.” Before he could comment I waved goodbye and left for home.  
    I lost myself in the semester's last classes. My hours in the gym were spent in the hardest training I’d ever done. Whenever I stopped pushing myself, my thoughts and feelings began to stir uneasily. I felt the first signs of what was to become a growing sense of alienation from my everyday world. For the first time in my life, I had a choice between two distinct realities. One was crazy and one was sane--but I just didn't know which was which, so I committed myself to neither.  
    I couldn't shake a growing sense that maybe, just maybe, Socrates was not so eccentric after all. Perhaps his descriptions of my life had been more accurate than I'd imagined. I began to realise how I acted with people, and what I saw began to disturb me. I was sociable enough on the outside, but I was really only concerned about myself.  
    Bill, one of my best friends, fell from the horse and broke his wrist; Rick learned a full twisting back somersault that he'd been working on for a year. I felt the same emotional response in both cases; nothing.  
    Under the weight of my growing self-knowledge, my self-esteem was sinking fast.  
    One night, just before finals, I heard a knock at my door. I was surprised and happy to find toothpaste Susie, the blond cheerleader  
    I hadn't seen in weeks. I realized how lonely I'd been.  
    “Aren't you going to invite me in, Danny?”  
    “Oh! Yes. I'm really glad to see you. Uh, sit down, let me take your coat, would you like something to eat? Something to drink?” She just gazed at me.  
    “What is it, Susie?”  
    “You look tired, Danny, but...” she reached out and touched  my face. “There's something…your eyes look different, somehow. What is it?”  
    I touched her cheek. “Stay with me tonight, Susie.”  
    “I thought you'd never ask. I brought my toothbrush!”  
    The next morning I turned over to smell Sue's tousled hair, sweet like summer straw, and to feel her soft breath on my pillow. “I should feel good,” I thought, but my mood was grey like the fog outside.  
    For the next few days, Sue and I spent a lot of time together. I don't think I was very good company, but Sue's spirits were enough for both of us.  
    Something kept me from telling her about Socrates. He was of another world, a world in which she had no part. How could she understand when I couldn't even fathom what was happening to me?  
    Finals came and went. I did well, but I didn't care. Susie went home for spring vacation, and I was glad to be alone.  
    Spring vacation was soon over, and warm winds blew through the littered streets of Berkeley. I knew that it was time to return to that warrior's world, to that strange little gas station--this time perhaps more open and more humble than before. But now I was more sure of one thing. If Socrates cut at me with his sharp wit again, I was going to slash right back!  
     

BOO K ONE  
     
    THE WINDS OF CHANGE  

 
Gusts of Magic  
     
    It was late evening. After my workout and dinner, I took a nap. When I awoke it was nearly midnight. I walked slowly through the crisp night air of early spring toward the station. A strong breeze blew from behind me, as if impelling me forward along the campus paths.  
    As I neared the familiar intersection, I