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say?
    So I went with something generic. “How are you feeling?”
    “Amazing. I feel great.”
    “But aren’t you in a lot of pain?”
    “It’s not that bad. The pills help a lot, but they make me tired more than anything. I feel weak, the doctor says I’ll have to do months of physical therapy before I’m back to full strength.”
    By now I was standing by the side of the bed, hands clutching my elbows. Here was Darren, just out of surgery and weakened with pain lying in a hospital bed, and yet I was the one feeling vulnerable.
    “That’s good,” I said.
    “Damn, Lauren, you’re much quieter than usual today. I’d have thought you’d be happier to see me.”
    “I am happy to see you, it’s just…” I trailed off.
    How could I give voice to the multifarious emotions running through me, my mind was going a million miles per minute. The self-doubt was back, and something about seeing Darren face to face was surreal. I knew what I wanted to say to him: I wanted to tell him I loved him, and not just as a friend . I wanted to tell him that I wanted to be with him and that I was dying to know if he felt the same. But was this the right time? Was I just being selfish? He was recovering from surgery after being wounded in battle, what right did I have to drop an emotional bombshell on him when he was in this condition? No, I wasn’t that bold. I would have to wait until the time was right, until I was sure he would return my affection.
    “Come here,” said Darren, reaching up for me with his good arm and pulling me down toward his bed. He held my head against his chest and slowly I wrapped my arms around him, giving him the best hug I could all things considered. I could feel his breath on my neck, warm as it blew against my soft skin. Chills went down my spine. Being held by him, this simple embrace, was everything to me right now. This was the moment I realized that everything would turn out alright. Then I heard him wince in pain.
    I shot back up, looking him in the eyes. “Are you ok?”
    “Yeah, I’m fine. You bumped my arm slightly but it’s ok.”
    “Oh, no, I’m so sorry.”
    “No, really, it’s fine. Just a bit sore still,” he said, giving me a brave smile. Darren could be in pure agony and he wouldn’t tell a soul. He was self-sufficient, he didn’t want to trouble people or have them waste their worry on him. How could I let him know that he didn’t always have to play the tough guy around me? How could I let him know I would be there with him through everything, both good and bad?
    “I just can’t believe you’re finally home,” I said softly.
    “I’m happy to be back in America, but damn I need to get the hell out of this bed. I’m going crazy, Lauren.”
    “Do you know how long they’re going to keep you here?”
    “No idea, they won’t really say. I know I look like I’m in awful shape, but I really don’t feel that bad, my arm hurts, that’s it. I can still walk and do every other normal thing. I just hate the idea of sitting in this bed getting all this attention when there’s another soldier who needs it more than me.”
    I reached out and squeezed the bicep of Darren’s good arm. He was always thinking of others, after all the sacrifices he’d made, he just wanted better things for those around him. There was no doubt in my mind that he considered every man in uniform his brother. He was willing to die for them, and for us civilians, too.
    “We’ll ask the doctor when he gets back how long they need to keep you here. I’m sure there are more tests they need to run, especially after the operation. They probably want to check your progress, make sure you’re recovering properly.”
    “I know. I’m just sick of laying down all the time. In Afghanistan, I used to run eight miles a day, workout, go through drills, work on intelligence projects, plan missions. In here I’m staring at the walls all the damn day, it’s enough to make a man go crazy.”
    He paused,