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the deafening sorrow that could only be matched by my own.
    Why, why am I dreaming about Luca? It’s puzzling and disturbing to me that he holds a place in my subconscious mind. The fact that I feel enough toward him to conjure him in my dreams unsettles me. It’s almost like he’s trying to tell me something, but I don’t really want to know what it is.
    I peek at the alarm clock, dreading that I have to get up and get ready for work. Being a paralegal at a law firm was never my ambition. I was supposed to go to law school with Tyler, we were supposed to graduate and open our own law firm, but fate had other plans, and after he died my dreams of practicing law died too. Sometimes I think that I was pursuing law just because he was. I don’t know if I have the drive for it now that he’s gone. His father tried for months to get me to go to law school and when I refused he tried to convince me to come work for him at his practice. He could never understand why I refused. He didn’t understand that I live with Tyler’s ghost everywhere I go; I didn’t need to live with it at work too. In fact, this job is just about the only place where I’m able to get away from it.
    I stretch one more time, throw the covers off of me, and get out of bed. I push away all of the dark memories and focus on the present, on putting one foot in front of the other and willing myself to get through this day. Just one day at a time, that’s the only way I’ve been able to function for the last forty-eight months. Life was never supposed to be like this, it held so much promise before, so much joy, and now it’s full of emptiness and monotony.

    After sitting at my desk, logging in to my computer, and prepping myself a cup of coffee, I peruse the contents of my email prioritizing my work for the day. The best part about this place is that I’ve been here long enough that everyone just leaves me alone to do my job. I know what I have to do, and I get it done without anybody hovering over my shoulder. I roll my eyes at the last minute meeting alert that pops up on my calendar—a meeting first thing Monday morning is exactly what I don’t need. Word of a new attorney joining the firm has been running rampant in this place, and I’m wondering if that’s what this is all about. I grab my coffee, a notebook and pen, and head over to the conference room where others have already started to gather. I pull up a chair next to Lisa. Aside from me, she’s been here the longest; she’s thin, frail almost, with hair that closely resembles the texture of straw. She’s the mousiest and most quiet person here. She’s also by far my favorite person, because she doesn’t even try to engage in small talk with me, and I’m pretty sure her mentality is similar to mine. She just wants to be left alone; it’s a win-win situation.
    There’s chatter going on around me but I’m zoned out, uninterested in what’s happening around me. My gaze travels to the window and my eyes lock on an old oak tree, trying to focus on something other than the mindless conversations of my coworkers.
    “Thank you all for being here on such short notice.” I hear Mr. Harvey, one of the partners at the firm, say. He personally hired me, and while I’m fond of him, I still can’t manage to bring my attention to him. “As you know we’ve been talking about expanding our firm for some time, looking to bring in fresh new talent to keep up with our growing caseload. I’d like you all to help me welcome the newest attorney to our practice, Luca Jensen.”
    My breath catches at the sound of his name, and I jerk my head to the front of the room, eyes wide, mouth open, and my body rigid as I take in the sight of him in his dark gray suit, looking like anything but the Luca I know and every bit like a capable attorney. I question whether I’m actually awake right now or stuck in a nightmare, as he looks my way. He pauses in surprise when he sees my face, clearly not expecting