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me.”  
    “Just because you two haven’t had sex
doesn’t mean he doesn’t love you.”
    “I know that.” I roughly wiped another
stray tear. “But when I’m with him, I don’t feel anything… God, Laney, I feel
like we’re just friends. Like our relationship is strictly platonic.”
    “Are you attracted to him?”
    “Of course I am. He’s good looking and
has a damn hot body.”
    If only I could see him naked.
    “And tonight, I actually got brave and
tried to come on to him, but he pushed me away.”
    “Why do you think he did that, aside
from not wanting to have sex?”
    Delaney always asked the good questions;
too bad she never asked herself those questions before doing stuff she later
regretted.
    “He claimed that French kissing wasn’t
honoring me and we shouldn’t be doing that in public.” I heaved a deep breath.
“Why won’t he make out with me? It’s not like the fires of Hell are going to
consume him.” I threw my hands up in the air as the frustration released. “I’m
his finance, damn it! That has to stand for something, right?”
    Delaney nodded, allowing me to vent all
my frustrations. “It should. Y’all do that stuff in private, right?”
    “No,” I whined.
    “What?” The whites of her eyes bulged.
“You’re kidding right?”
    “I’m telling you, we’ve only shared
sweet kisses and held hands. What if things don’t get better once we’re
married? What am I supposed to do then? Marriage is a huge step and I… I just
don’t know if I’m ready for that.” I squeezed my arms tighter around my body,
convincing myself that it was okay to admit the truth.
    “Look,” she sighed, “I’m going to be
honest with you. Regardless of staying on home plate, you should both have a
strong attraction toward one another and be in love. Like, visibly in love.”
    She stared at me, waiting for an answer.
I turned my head, averting her questioning gaze.
    “You’re in love with him, aren’t you?”
    Nodding, I said, “Well, yeah. I’ve been
with him forever.”
    “Just because you two have been together
for four years doesn’t mean you should get married.”
    “I know, but our parents, family, and
friends are expecting us to marry.”
    “Lexi, that’s not why people get
married.” She latched on to both of my arms, forcing me to look at her. “People
agree to marry because they are in love and can’t live without each other.
Their feelings run deep and in essence have become one. They know that they
can’t live without the other. Do you and Collin have that type of love?”
    I pressed my lips together. “Sweet pecks
and holding hands isn’t enough for me to know.”
    “Then you need to ask yourself a very
important question.”
    I hesitated for a moment, searching her
eyes for what she was trying to make me see. “Do we love each other enough to
get married?”
    “Exactly.”
    Σ

Chapter 4
     
    It took me the rest of the week to
pull myself together, but I still wasn’t sure how to solve my problem. Collin had
texted me that night, apologizing if he hurt my feelings. Eager to move
forward, I forgave him and told him I was sorry, too. Thankfully, Raven had canceled
our Thursday session so I didn’t have him to distract me. As an offering of
peace, Collin asked me out on a date and I chose a movie.
    I took my time getting dressed,
making sure I had the perfect outfit, makeup and hair. My number one goal was
to look sexy for Collin. If we were getting married, I had to make sure he was
attracted to me. Like Delaney had said, we needed an unfailing love for one
another that warranted marriage. Not only did I owe it to myself, but to him.
We deserved to be with someone we loved wholeheartedly, not just someone we
cared about.
    My phone chimed and I eagerly
picked it up.
    Collin: I’m outside waiting for
you.
    Me: I’m on my way.
    “Delaney, I’m leaving,” I yelled
from across the suite.
    She rushed into my dorm room. “Wow,
you look good,” she said, giving me