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From across the circle, Sammie watched me check out Ms. Carew’s fashionable feet and flashed me an amused smile, as if to say, “
I told you she was cool
.”
    â€œToday, I’d like to ask if anyone is willing to share a secret,” Ms. Carew said. “Know that whatever we say in this room stays in this room, and that your secret is safe with us.”
    The first one to raise a hand was Bernard.
    â€œI keep my weight a secret,” he said, “because I weigh more than anyone thinks I do. I have this roll of fat around my middle that no one knows about. When I go to the beach, I keep my shirt on and when my family asks why, I tell them that I don’t want to get sunburned. So I guess you could say that everything between my chest and my hips is a big fat secret.”
    I was amazed. First, because he was so willing to just put it out there. And second, because I never thought boys worried about their weight or how they looked in a bathing suit. It was news to me.
    â€œI know exactly how you feel, Bernard,” Sammie was saying. “I worry all the time about my weight. I’m always wondering if everyone is looking at me and thinking how fat I am.”
    â€œYou’re not fat,” I responded immediately. “You look fine. Dad’s just made you feel fat because you’re heavier than me.”
    Ms. Carew held up her hand.
    â€œCharlie,” she said gently. “I know Sammie appreciates your remarks, but we’re not here to talk people out of how they’re feeling. Whatever they feel is their truth, and we have to listen with open hearts and accept their feelings as real.”
    That seemed crazy to me. I mean, just because you feel something doesn’t make it true. But everyone else was nodding in agreement. Suddenly, I felt so stupid sitting there.
    The next person to talk was Will Lee.
    â€œMy secret is that I like older women,” he said. “I’m only in the sixth grade, but I’m always falling in love with seventh-graders.”
    Was he looking at me out of the corner of his eye? Oh no, I hoped not.
    â€œRecently, I had a crush on one of my sister’s friends, and she’s in the eighth grade,” he went on. “I asked if she wanted to hang out with me some weekend, and she rejected me. Made up some phony excuse about having a boyfriend, which I happen to know she doesn’t because I hear her talking on the phone with my sister.”
    â€œYou need to pick on people your own size.” I chuckled, giving him a friendly little poke in the ribs. It was hard to take him seriously. He seemed like such a little kid.
    â€œI’m uncomfortable with the way you’re acting,” a girl named Keisha said. I looked around to see who she was talking to—it was me!
    â€œI was just making a joke,” I said.
    â€œWill was opening up about a secret he has,” Keisha said. “I don’t think he was looking to be laughed at.”
    I felt myself flush with anger.
    â€œI wasn’t laughing
at
him,” I said in a voice that sounded snappier than I had intended. “I was laughing
with
him. There’s a big difference.”
    â€œCharlie is new to our group,” Ms. Carew told the others. “She’s just learning to listen and accept.”
    Boy, that made me feel even more idiotic. How hard is it to listen? I have ears and Dr. Hartley checks my hearing every year at my annual checkup. I
was
listening. I truly didn’t understand what I was doing wrong.
    â€œI just want to support Charlie and say that I’m glad she’s here,” Alicia said. “She’s been going through some tough times, and she could use all our support.”
    Everyone in the circle turned to me. I felt like they were expecting me to spill my guts about what I’d been going through, but I could feel myself closing up like a clam shell. I hate it when I’m expected to do something that I’m