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Luke contacted my professors and told them what happened. They were all very accommodating in providing the assignments I would miss over the next week, although right now, I don’t even see the point in going back to school. I have no drive, no motivation to do anything.
    I sleep a lot, and when I’m not sleeping, I walk around like a zombie. We’ve been here for months and I’ve only walked the path to the dock once. It’s not the same as the one I shared with Will. Now that he’s gone, I don’t know if I’ll ever go back again. To sit in that artificial place will only make it hurt more.
    Claire tries, but I can’t eat either. I’m a mess, I haven’t showered in days, and I don’t care. Luke and Claire are more attentive to me than Gram was after my parents died, which is to say they’re attentive at all. Gram blamed me and wanted to move on and act like they never existed. Not Claire. She asks me every day if I’m ready to talk and she tells me that I can cry, yell, scream or do anything I need to do to get through the pain. I never reply to her, but I appreciate that I don’t have to.

Chapter 5
     
    The memorial service for Will and his mother is today. We flew in last night and are staying with Caroline’s family. We could have stayed at our old house since Luke and Claire haven’t even put it on the market yet, but I just couldn’t. There are too many memories of Will and me there that I just couldn’t bear it. Besides, I think Claire wants Caroline’s mom to observe me – make sure I’m not going to go off the deep end. Too late.
    I initially didn’t want to come because it makes me sick to my stomach to think of Will’s father standing up there in front of everyone, lying about how much he loved his wife and son, and how much he’ll miss them. I’m here because I care more about honoring Will than the charade his father will put on. I also have to show Mr. Meyer that I’m strong and resilient.
    I wear a black pencil skirt and Will’s favorite blue top. I twist my hair up, and clasp the necklace Will gave me around my neck. As I pull my hands from behind my neck the light hits my ring and the sparkle catches my eye. I stare at it for a few long moments like I have over the last several days. Will’s words echo in my mind and I quickly remember the promise I made to him. I remember that night like it was yesterday. The speech he gave that day at graduation about seizing the opportunity of a lifetime in the lifetime of the opportunity. Will was my once in a lifetime opportunity. He was everything I wanted and his love was everything I worked so hard to finally deserve.
    He may be gone, but I will never let him go. My heart will forever belong to Will Meyer.
    As we arrive at the church, I’m greeted by Chris and Tyler, who sandwich me in a hug like big brothers. Gwen and Caroline are close behind them, arms extended. At some point all four of them have their arms wrapped around me and I feel so incredibly loved. I flash back to my grandparent’s funeral and wish that I had allowed people to care for me like this then. I realize how much easier it may have made things.
    The five of us sit together, with Chris and Tyler sitting on one side of me and Gwen and Caroline on the other. Tyler holds my hand and lets me squeeze it whenever I think I’m going to lose it. Will’s father approaching the podium is one such time. I’ll have to check with Ty at the end of the service to make sure he has all five fingers left.
    “Thank you all for coming today. It is under sad and tragic circumstances that we are gathered here. But still, we celebrate. We celebrate the lives of two incredible individuals. Eliana and William were the two most important people in my life.
    “Eliana was a good mother and a fine wife. Those of you who spent time with her know that she cared deeply for others and was always involved in one charity or another. She never failed to put others before herself and I loved and