Read To Catch a Creeper for Free Online Page B

ever since.
    And I’m not sure exactly what I think about her. For some reason I feel uncomfortable when she’s around.I don’t know, maybe it’s because she’s so fiercely single and making pots of money in her insurance career.I still can’t fathom why she’d want to hang about with us boring married housewives – unless she’s studying us to snigger over with her much trendier friends. Or maybe it’s because she has opinions so strong you could use them as steel girders on an oil rig.
    She’s not even really officially allowed to be part of the WOWs as it’s only supposed to be for mothers, but Henrietta insisted it was only right that we are accepting of all. Plus we lost three members in a short space of time so we were desperate.
    ‘Incidentally,’ Isobel perks up, ‘did you hear the latest about the Crouch End Creeper? Totally hysterical,’ she giggles. ‘The police think he’s a transvestite.’
    ‘Really!’ Janet exclaims. ‘God. Why would they think that?’
    ‘Because someone saw a masculine-looking woman in an indigo dress and black lambswool coat around the same time the last burglary took place. The police are warning people to look out for a woman, over six foot tall, with broad shoulders, hairy legs…’
    ‘…and a five o’clock shadow,’ Janet finishes. ‘Is this for real?’
    ‘Apparently so,’ Isobel laughs.
    Henrietta’s glaring fixedly at the menu.
    ‘Trust the pigs,’ Janet says fiercely, ‘to go after the sexual deviants.’
    ‘Transvestites aren’t sexual deviants,’ I jump in. ‘They’re just normal men in touch with their feminine side. It’s not like they’re–’
    ‘Gay?’ Janet raises a scornful eyebrow at me.
    ‘I didn’t say that,’ I protest. ‘I was thinking about child molesters.’ Why does she always put me on the sodding defensive?
    ‘Weak and confused, that’s what they are,’ Janet says, sniffily. ‘Neither one thing nor the other.’
    Henrietta pushes her chair back. ‘I need the loo.’
    ‘Me too,’ I add.
    ‘You know I think I need to go as well.’ Isobel starts to stand up and Henrietta glares at her.
    ‘There’s only two cubicles,’ I dictate bossily. ‘You keep Janet company.’
    Janet’s staring at us as if we’re all mad. ‘Is this a straight women thing?’ she asks. ‘Peeing in packs.’
    ‘Oh, it’s OK,’ Isobel sits down again looking slightly despondent, ‘I can wait.’
    I glance across at Henrietta who’s already halfway across the restaurant. When I reach the toilets, she’s leaning forward with her hands pressed hard down against the sink, looking like she’s about to throw up.
    ‘Neil’s got a lambswool coat,’ she says. ‘I bought it for him.’
    ‘So what?’ I shrug. ‘Masses of men probably do. This season’s fabric.’
    ‘And an indigo frock,’ she adds flatly.
    A toilet flushes and we both fall silent as a small tubby lady comes out of a stall and washes her hands.
    ‘A frock…’ I echo, as the door shuts behind the lady.
    ‘He likes dressing up in women’s clothes. Like you said, it’s no big deal.’
    ‘No, ’course not,’ I say, smiling and nodding to prevent my head from shaking in disbelief. Neil, Henrietta’s husband, the loveliest man in the universe is a
transvestite
. And she’s never told me.
    ‘And he’s over six feet tall. Just like the Creeper.’
    ‘Well, I bet there’s thousands of transvestites in Crouch End,’ I add enthusiastically. ‘Or hundreds anyway. Doesn’t follow that they’ll target him.’
    ‘Even though he
completely
matches the description of the Crouch End Creeper?’
    ‘No, but, yes, but… Look, Henrietta,’ I put my arm around her, ‘it’s not conclusive that the burglar’s a transvestite, is it? And we know Neil didn’t do it.’
    ‘So what should we do?’ Henrietta sounds bitter. ‘Ring the police and suggest they’re barking up the wrong tranny? The minute they know Neil has a lambswool coat, they’ll place him top of