so much so that I had to remind myself to look at the road. Even in the distance the Strip was a flashing panoply of colored light, like a boardwalk carnival writ huge across the desert landscape. It only got bigger, and bigger as Las Vegas Boulevard became the Strip proper. We passed the Stratosphere and slowed down with the traffic to the perpetual crawl of the Strip and just stared at the sight of all that light and color. Even Andi was hushed by the spectacle, so much so that she almost missed the turn.
“Hey, here it is.”
I pulled off the road, up a ramp towards a parking garage. I started towards the self-service parking but Andi punched my shoulder.
“Go to the valets.”
Andi led the way, strutting through the garage after the attendants took the car, and slipped the ticket in her back pocket. The downtown hotels were big but this place was enormous. We walked out into a lobby that had to be four stories high, with a sky painted on the ceiling, and a twenty foot tall marble statue in the middle of a fountain ahead of us. Andi looked around and whistled.
“Why didn’t we stay here?” I said.
“Downtown is a better deal,” said Andi. “We’re gonna miss the show.”
“What show?”
Then I saw it. It took me a moment to process what All Male Nude Revue meant.
I stopped in place, I crossed my arms, and I put my foot down. Literally.
“No.”
Andi sighed and gave me a sharp look. “Chris, come on.”
“I said no.”
“Look, it’s not like we’re going to a strip club where some guy is going to grind his dong in your face. I just want you to see more than one dude’s dick in your lifetime. It’s my civic duty.”
I shook my head and my voice tightened. I was really getting mad.
“No. I’m not doing this, Andi. I refuse.”
Andi crinkled her nose. “I already bought the damn tickets.”
“No.”
“It’s just a show, Chris. Come on.”
“I said no. I’m not going. I’ll wait for you out here.”
“Fine,” Andi snapped. “I paid, I’m going in. You can just sit out here and sulk.”
She stormed off, leaving no room for further argument. I watched her get in line and headed for the casino floor.
I was scared of getting my purse snatched, so all I had on me was my driver’s license and a wad of cash. After I glanced back and saw Andi enter the amphitheater to watch the show, I glumly sat down at a slot machine and fed it a twenty.
I did not want to spoil my friendship with Andi and have her move out of my life on a sour note. That’s why I was here in the first place. But, I knew that he would never go to a strip club or a show like that with naked girls, and he would view it as betraying me. I looked at my ring and knew I owed him the same.
So I plunked away on the nickel slot machine, doomed to wind down my twenty dollar bill, since I had no idea what I was doing. I just hit the MAX BET button over and over and wished Andi was there with me. She’d make a joke about who Max was and make wasting money fun somehow.
The show couldn’t be more than an hour, maybe an hour and a half, tops. Andi would walk out with some guy’s thong on her head and tell me a crazy story and we’d make up and go do something else all night until we crawled back to the room, and then it was just another day of fooling around until it was time to go the airport and I would be back home.
It was half over, and the Big Day was ticking ever closer, minute by minute. Now that everything was ready, my dress, the cake, the hall, the arrangements with the church, all I had to do was wait, and that was, for sure, the hardest part.
I looked over at the bar. I was the designated driver but I could have one, right? I was bored out of my mind. Maybe I’d just have some ginger ale and pretend it was scotch or something. I got up and wandered over, leaving a dollar in the slot machine, unclaimed. The old lady that took my spot didn’t deign to point out that my wagers were not yet finished. Part of