Read THIEF: Part 4 for Free Online Page B

with false arrogance, “I am.I gave up smoking cigarettes cold-turkey, the fall after I traveled Europe.”
                  “Ooh, la-la.”
                  “Make fun all you want.It was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done, but I did it.”
                  “Really.”
                  “Yep.Every morning, when I craved a cigarette the most, I’d tell myself, ‘You don’t need to smoke to start your day.You can get that rush from something else.’”
                  “Espresso?”
                  “Running.I’d wake up, get a craving, then tell myself I didn’t need it—and I’d put on my sneakers instead.Take a lap around my building, or through the park.”
                  “Okay, well—I can’t run right now.”
                  “No, that’s not the point.”He shook his head, taking another bite.“Running gave me a rush, to replace the one I missed from cigarettes.Negative thinking gives you something, too—you just need to find out what, then replace it with something that gives you thatsame thing.Something better.”
                  “Negative thinking, as you like to call it, is just me facing facts.Being realistic.”
                  He drummed his fingers on the dining table, thinking.“Okay, then.That’s what it is—you don’t want to get your hopes up and be let down.You want nothing but the facts.Real, solid info.That comforts you.”
                  “What is this, Psych 101?”
                  “So,” he continued, ignoring me, “we just need to find something that gives you that comfort, without making you think the worst.”
                  “Why?”
                  “Because it’s unhealthy,” he said, like I should’ve already known that.“Negative thinking’s been scientifically proven to worsen health problems.”
                  I sighed, finally giving up.“Let’s find a replacement then.”
                  “Already got one: research.”
                  I just stared at him.“Research.That’s your answer.”
                  He spread his hands.“Why not?It gives you those real facts you need—no sugarcoating, no bullshit—and comforts you, because when you have all the answers, things aren’t so scary anymore.”Alex took a sip of coffee, clearly pleased with his plan.“And to stop the negative thinking pattern, try a mantra, like I did.Every time you catch yourself thinking the worst, think something like, ‘No, I’m not going to think like this anymore.I’ve done my research; I know the facts.’”
                  “Thought that was what I was doing,” I muttered, fishing for my last bits of cereal in the bowl.
                  “And I thought cigarettes weren’t affecting me,” he says, “until one day, I couldn’t finish this hike in Switzerland that I’d done, like, a million times.My lungs sounded like rusty boat motors.”He took my hands across the table, gently massaging my palms with his thumbs.“Just give it a shot, Erin.You’re going to get good news today, anyway—I can feel it.”
                  I didn’t tell him what I was thinking: that any news I got was rarely good, and that I expected bad things to happen to me so often…because they did.After all, some people are born lucky—Alex undoubtedly being one of them—and that meant, in the end, some people had to be born unlucky.Yin and yang.
                  Now, though, when Dr. Brody tells me my last round of medication will be the second week in December, before we play the waiting game, I stop my automatic thoughts: I still won’t look healthy in time for Aunt Jane’s wedding.Maybe I’m not cured; it could come back, after all that.What if I need a donor?
                  What if I