eyes.”
“Drugs?” Nowhere in those fucking reports had anyone
mentioned drugs. Alea would never have done that of her own free will. She was
so proud and seemingly in control. So…fuck. Her captors had drugged her. Hell,
just how much of her soul had they taken?
“Shit. I’d hoped Tal would have let you in on that since
you’re her bodyguard.” Cole groaned a little. “I’m going to get my ass kicked,
but Tal, Rafe, and Kade are treating her with kid gloves. She’s drifting. I
know they think they’re sheltering her, but someone has to push that girl to
open up. Look, I understand the impulse to stay out of things. I really do, but
if there’s one thing I’ve learned about getting people to heal…sometimes you
gotta give them a shove. You can’t just hope people will change all by
themselves. If you care about Alea, you have to pry her open, man. She’s not
made of glass. That woman fought like hell in that brothel. She fought to get
off the drugs. Maybe she just needs a little help from someone to help her
fight for her future.”
Wouldn’t he love to be that someone? “Man, she’d just fight
me, too.”
Lan stared at her openly now, not even trying to disguise
his longing. He didn’t give a shit what anyone else thought. He was in love
with that woman. She would never love him back. They came from different
worlds. She was a princess, and he had no idea who his father was.
But maybe sometimes love wasn’t about getting what he
wanted. Maybe sacrifice was really at the heart of it. If he pushed her, fought
for her, maybe she could tear down that tough-girl mask and find a way to be
happy—even if it wasn’t with him, Dane, and Coop.
“I don’t think you’ll have to fight her too hard. Just push
a little every day. Talk to her. Don’t let up and don’t let her force you to
the side. I know how this goes. Jessa tried her hardest to shove us out of her
life. She said some horrible things to me. It hurt, but then I realized she was
both lashing out and testing us. Burke and I had hurt her when we’d left her
alone. She had to push until she realized we weren’t going to disappear again,
no matter what. Nothing she could say or do was going to throw us out of her
life. Alea might have the same M.O.”
“We’ve never been with Alea.”
“We?”
Lan felt himself flush. Damn
it . “We all have feelings for her, me, Dane, and Coop. We thought we could
pursue her together, but she wasn’t interested in us, either together or
apart.”
“Or she’s scared that none of you can accept what she’s been
through.”
“She survived. That’s the only thing that matters. Why
wouldn’t we accept that?”
“Survival is a funny thing, man, and you damn well know it.
When you’re down in the trenches all that matters is living, but it’s not so
simple once you return to the real world. People judge you. You measure what
you did to live against conventional social mores…and suddenly what once seemed
like a simple choice is murky and gray.”
He knew exactly what Cole was talking about.
“That’s when you have to deal with the reality that you
lived and some didn’t,” Cole went on. “That’s when you have to accept who the
fuck you really are.”
He hadn’t thought about it that way before. Alea was a
survivor, but she had a heart. How guilty did she feel for getting out alive
when others hadn’t? How ashamed was she by whatever she’d had to do in order to
live? She’d been through a war of sorts, and he had no idea how much of herself
she’d lost along the way.
The fact that Alea had survived and could function now
proved how strong she was. She deserved better than to be treated like some
fragile doll who couldn’t make a decision about her own life. Despite what all
the other guys thought, she could handle the truth. Being in control of her
future might even help her heal from the