to being depressed again, are you? Because
I thought college was healing that.”
“I was never depressed,” I respond flatly. “Just quiet.”
She sighs exaggeratedly and I grit my teeth. “Look, honey, I
just wanted to let you know that Caleb’s probably going to be
pressing charges against Kayden for what he did.”
“What!” I exclaim, startling Luke enough that he jumps and
swerves the truck a little and the side of the tire clips the curb,
causing the truck to lurch. He quickly regains control and I lower
my voice and press my finger to my ear to hear better as I huddle
toward the door. “What the fuck do you mean he’s pressing
charges?”
“Callie Lawrence, you will not use that kind of language on
the phone with me, young lady,” she warns. “You know how much I
don’t like the F word.”
“Sorry,” I apologize. “But why is Caleb pressing charges? They
both beat each other up.”
“No, Kayden hit Caleb for no reason,” she says. “Caleb was
just defending himself.”
“He didn’t hit him for no reason. He hit him because of me.”
It slips out like poison vapor and I choke on each syllable.
There’s an extensive pause. “Callie, what do you mean he hit
Caleb because of you? Why would he do that?”
My shoulders curl in as the shame and the dirtiness floods
my body and I remember her limited ability to understand things.
“It’s nothing. I’m just upset and saying stuff. It doesn’t mean
anything.”
She pauses again and I wonder if for a split second, she’s
contemplating my words on a deeper level. “Callie, is there
something you want to tell me?”
When I breathe again, it’s deafening and I swear the whole
world can hear it and they know my secret. “No, Mom.”
“Okay then.” She sounds disappointed, like I was just about
to give her the secret locked in a box inside me. But only Kayden
has the key to it. “Well, I just wanted to let you know in case it
comes up. I know his best friend goes to school there with you and
I don’t want you to have to hear it by gossip.”
I shake my head. “All right.”
“I’ll talk to you later, Callie.”
“Okay, bye.”
We hang up and I clutch the phone in my hand, strangling
the life out of it. My palms start to sweat and I can’t stop thinking about Kayden. He did it for me. He did it for me. I need to save
him. “I think we should go to Afton.”
When Luke looks at me, there are lines on his forehead and
his hands are gripping the steering wheel. “Really?”
“Yeah.” I raise my hips and slide the phone into the pocket of
my jeans. “My mom said Caleb’s going to press charges against
Kayden.”
He keeps some of his attention on the road as he turns the
truck into the parking lot in front of my dorm. “Are you shitting
me?”
I zip up my coat and put my gloves on. “No, and I need to fix
it… somehow. It’s my fault it happened to begin with.”
He parks the truck near the front, puts his hand on the
shifter, and pushes it into park. The radio plays and the engine
keeps cutting out. I wonder if he knows why Kayden beat up Caleb
that night, if he ever told him.
“All right, it’s a deal.” Luke stares at the McIntyre residence
hall in front of us. It’s the tallest of the residence halls at the
University of Wyoming and it looks lonely, towering above the
others. “You want to leave tonight or in the morning?”
I grab the door handle and pull on it. “In the morning. I’d like
Seth to come too if that’s okay.”
He nods and reaches for his pack of cigarettes on the
dashboard. “That’s fine as long as you guys don’t mind squishing
into this thing. It’s a piece of shit, but Seth’s car’s never going to make it to Afton with all the snow.”
I shove open the door. “He’ll be fine with it I’m sure.” I swing
my feet over the edge of the seat, getting ready to jump down.
“Callie,” Luke calls out. “Is there