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of the time. I am masturbating,
and my husband stands next to the bed, also masturbating,
until he comes on my face. It doesn't sound like much, but it
is, shall we say, reliable.
    Amber, age 24
Bisexual
Live-in relationship/marriage
No children
Some college
Sales
Texas, USA
    My husband is a turn-on for me, as are compliments, some
forms of role-playing, silky clothes and bubble baths. To be
honest, anything can be sexy if I think about it the right way.
I have two fantasies, the first one involves seducing a priest.
That's fairly straightforward. The second is about my best
friend. He says all the right things and makes all the right
noises. There's nothing special about the fantasy. It changes.
The most important thing is, he wants me and that want drives
me crazy. It translates itself into me doing all sorts of dirty
things in earnest. I fantasise about things being simple and
hot, I guess.
    Tiffini, age 34
Heterosexual
Virgin
Single, occasionally sexually active
College degree
Design
West Virginia, USA
    I'm turned on by intelligence, someone to talk to. I think it's
good to have some form of fantasy in any relationship, just
don't go overboard or it could become chaos; remember
simplicity. And yes, I'm a virgin, but that doesn't mean I'm
innocent. I just haven't fallen in love with someone to have
sex with. But I've had fun without 'going all the way'. The best
sex I ever had was when I was in a nightclub with a boyfriend
(now my ex-boyfriend) and went down on him in a corner. On
the way back home we were walking along and found an
empty area down a little slope of a hill and he went down on
me (while I was gazing up at the stars).
    In my fantasy there's a tall man with dark hair, not necessarily
what mainstream society would consider good-looking.
He will do anything I want. He starts by undressing me gently
and slowly, one item of clothing at a time. While doing so, he
lets me undress him at the same time. He then lays me down
and we make love, with him on top, and then me on top. We
will be as one when he enters me and this continues on going,
with di-erent positions and not a lot of talking – we just let
our bodies go in whatever direction is happening at the
moment. Anything goes, a little spanking of me when I'm on
top, a little of tying me to the bed when I'm on the bottom.
When I climax I let him know how appreciative I am . . . a little
bit of petting and sucking and massaging.
    Brenna, age 38
Heterosexual
Live-in relationship/marriage
Children
Bachelor's degree and professional certificate
Author/Teacher
Massachusetts, USA
    The best sex I ever had was make-up sex when my husband
and I got back together after being legally separated. We'd
separated because he was having an a-air. I had a fling of my
own (a gent that was in an open relationship). While that didn't
go well, badly enough that I decided I wasn't cut out for meaningless
sex, it showed me that I was desirable again. To boot,
I lost about 30 pounds, since I couldn't eat or sleep early on in
the separation. I got my self-image up and found my muse
again. I wasn't taking any crap from him. And, when we did
end up in bed again, it was positively explosive. You see . . . even
my sister admits the man is my soul mate, so when we are
together and doing well, we really mesh. There's also a deep
emotional bond between us. The second best sex I've had was
when he graduated boot camp. We'd been apart for eight weeks,
and when we got back to my hotel room, the first time involved
flying clothing and sex that was over – quite explosively for
both of us – in about 90 seconds. We had sex, as memory serves,
six times in the first thirty-six hours. Even later in our marriage,
we averaged sex every eighteen hours, when he was in port.
What would improve my sex life now would be me losing
about 40 or more pounds and the kids being out more during
times when we're both at home.
    In the past I particularly enjoyed some of the old romance
books, the ones that would be