and I fear not mine own shame so much as his peril.
I had rather than a thousand pound he were out of the
house.
MISTRESS PAGE For shame, never stand 105 ‘you had rather’ and
‘you had rather’. Your husband’s here at hand! Bethink you
of some conveyance 107 — in the house you cannot hide him. O,
how have you deceived me? Look, here is a basket. If he be of
any reasonable stature, he may creep in here, and throw foul
linen upon him, as if it were going to bucking. Or — it is
whiting-time 111 — send him by your two men to Datchet Mead.
MISTRESS FORD He’s too big to go in there. What shall I do?
FALSTAFF Let me see’t, let me see’t, O, let me see’t!
Comes out of hiding
I’ll in, I’ll in. Follow your friend’s counsel. I’ll in.
MISTRESS PAGE What, Sir John Falstaff? Are these
Aside to Falstaff
your letters, knight?
FALSTAFF I love thee. Help me away. Let me creep in here. I’ll
never—
Gets into the basket. They cover him with foul linen/To Robin
MISTRESS PAGE Help to cover your master, boy.—
Call your men, Mistress Ford.— You dissembling 120
To Falstaff
knight!
MISTRESS FORD What, John! Robert! John!
[
Exit Robin
]
[
Enter John and Robert
]
Go take up these clothes here quickly. Where’s the cowl - staff 123 ?
Look, how you drumble 124 ! Carry them to the
They attempt to fit the cowl-staff
laundress in Datchet Mead. Quickly, come.
[
Enter Ford, Page, Caius and Evans
]
FORD Pray you, come near. If I suspect without
To Page, Caius and Evans
cause, why then make sport at me, then let
me be your jest, I deserve it. How now? Whither bear you
this?
JOHN To the laundress, forsooth.
MISTRESS FORD Why, what have you to do 131 whither they bear it?
You were best meddle with buck-washing 132 .
FORD Buck 133 ? I would I could wash myself of the buck!
Buck, buck, buck! Ay, buck! I warrant you, buck — and of 134
the season too, it shall appear.
[
Exeunt John and Robert with the basket
]
Gentlemen, I have dreamed tonight 136 . I’ll tell you my dream.
Here, here, here be my keys: ascend my chambers 137 , search,
seek, find out. I’ll warrant we’ll unkennel 138 the fox. Let me stop
this way first. So, now uncape 139 .
Locks the door
PAGE Good Master Ford, be contented 140 . You wrong yourself
too much.
FORD True, Master Page. Up, gentlemen. You shall see
sport anon. Follow me, gentlemen.
[
Exit
]
EVANS This is fery fantastical humours and jealousies.
CAIUS By gar, ’tis no the fashion of France: it is not jealous
in France.
PAGE Nay, follow him, gentlemen. See the issue of his
search.
[
Exeunt Page, Caius and Evans
]
MISTRESS PAGE Is there not a double excellency in this?
MISTRESS FORD I know not which pleases me better, that my
husband is deceived, or Sir John.
MISTRESS PAGE What a taking 152 was he in, when your husband
asked who was in the basket!
MISTRESS FORD I am half afraid he will have need of washing 154 , so
throwing him into the water will do him a benefit.
MISTRESS PAGE Hang him, dishonest rascal! I would all of the
same strain 157 were in the same distress.
MISTRESS FORD I think my husband hath some special suspicion
of Falstaff’s being here, for I never saw him so gross in his
jealousy till now.
MISTRESS PAGE I will lay a plot to try 161 that, and we will yet have
more tricks with Falstaff: his dissolute disease will scarce
obey this medicine.
MISTRESS FORD Shall we send that foolish carrion 164 , Mistress
Quickly, to him, and excuse his throwing into the water, and
give him another hope, to betray him to another punishment?
MISTRESS PAGE We will do it: let him be sent for tomorrow eight
o’clock to have amends.
[
Enter Ford, Page, Caius and Evans
]
FORD I cannot find him. Maybe the knave bragged of