realise how busy Fridays were going to be.â
âOh ⦠I hadnât â¦â
âWhen Nannyâs here they spend a lot of time in the garden. Didnât she tell you?â
3
Lady SnailwoodâZena to the hundreds of people who knew her, and also to tens of thousands who did notâwas in one of her most familiar attitudes, half-curled on a nest of huge satin cushions near the centre of the Great Hall, wearing a white Aertex shirt, white cotton slacks and a pair of strangely mannish brogues, looking tiny compared with the enormous borzoi whose ears she was fondling. She was always smaller than strangers expected and often somehow than acquaintances remembered, but this was evidently one of her days for looking frail and protectorless. It was also one of her days for a faintly Ruritanian accent.
âSo here you are at last, Vincent, darling,â she drawled, making it sound as though it was she alone who had organised his rescue from grim dungeons into this house of comfort. âIâm so happy the soldiers let you go.â
âThey werenât, very.â
âSilly little men. You must take no notice of them.â
âI have to. Itâs the system.â
âThen we will change it.â
âYou â¦â
âDonât argue, Vince,â said Harry, who was lolling some yards away on a chintzed armchair, smoking. âZena means she thinks she would look stunning in a field marshalâs uniform. Thatâs what sheâs after. Sheâs going to start by spending this week-end drilling her guests on the tennis court. Youâre here to teach her the words of command.â
âOh yes!â cried Zena, sitting up. âAnd one day I shall ride my white charger through the Arch of Victory at the head of all my armies!â
âYouâll have to arrange for a war, you know,â said Harry. âEnemies to conquer are the main thing, I suppose.â
âThey are there already. We will conquer the Bolsheviks. The new Tsar shall ride by my sideâonly a little behind.â
âOn the other hand,â said Harry, âyou could arrange for a Wonderland warâvictory first, fighting afterwards. I shouldnât be surprised if that wasnât the coming thing in any case.â
Zena lay back among the cushions, which were located where the sunlight, passing through the stained glass at the top of one of the windows, mottled the floor with blotches of colour. It would be difficult to be sure whether Zena was conscious of this effect, and whether she was wearing white to take advantage of it, but as she moved and the colours moved across her it was almost as though she was practising to become the Chameleon Woman in a fairground, effortlessly adapting her own hues to those of the cushions on which she sprawled.
âThat stupid Alice,â she yawned. âOf course England is no longer great when it is the only book our intelligentsia really care about. Darling Vince, I am so pleased your stammer is becoming so much better.â
âPretty well under control, thank you,â said Vincent with no obvious effort over the guttural.
âI do not understand how you can give orders to your men when you stammer so.â
âIâll show you. Parade! Paraaaaade ⦠Shun!â
The commands came out full volume, in the extraordinary gargling yelp of the army drill instructor. The Great Hall was a large enough space to set up a perceptible echo. Zena put her hands over her ears.
âPlease do not do that again,â she said. âNow you have given me a migraine.â
âHave you seen?â said Harry. âZenaâs had a new picture done.â
âI thought there was something different,â said Vincent. âIâm still not used to the room like this ⦠oh yes, there. I say. I like that much better than the John. I think thatâs distinctly jolly.â
He went and stood by