conversation is so
inapproprié
.â She spread her hands, indicating the surroundings.
âSorry, Ms. Simpson. The doc and I have a few areas of disagreement.â
âMore than a few,â Seth added in a low voice.
âDonât think I didnât hear that.â Mort turned his back to Seth and addressed Eve. âWho owns your haunted house now?â
âThe lawyer said it may take a little while to settle the estate, but itâll probably be Elliot Cooper until the house is sold. Heâs been living in Alaska, but heâs coming home for the funeral.â
âIf he ever gets here,â Seth put in. âI understand heâs coming by motorcycle. Doesnât he know that airplanes fly to other places than the wilds of Alaska?â
âAre you sure Elliot wonât change his mind and want to keep the house?â Mort asked.
âItâs much too big for one person,â Eve said.
âOnly one person lived there for more than thirty years,â I reminded her.
âTrue, but Cliff wanted the house sold. He made that point to both you and me, Jessica. He even had you write it in his will. And he wanted
me
to have the listing. He said I was the perfect person to sell it. I happen to agree, although I think he was just flattering me. Itâs a veritable nightmare, that house, and he knew it. Thereâs no way Elliot can manage a place that large. Frankly, I think heâll want to take the money and go back to Alaska as fast as he can.â
âIsnât he the boy who had a crush on the Conrad twinsâ great-niece?â Seth asked.
âThatâs the one,â I said.
Mort looked at me and squinted. âThe Conrad twins, those elderly ladies who live in that little cottage across the way from Cliff Cooperâs place?â
âYes.â
âIâve seen them around town but donât think I ever met them. And I know I never met this Elliot guy.â
âThereâs no reason why youâd have met Lettie and Lucy Conrad,â Seth said, âunless they decided to become a live version of
Arsenic and Old Lace
and kill somebody.â
âElliot Cooper is Cliffâs grandson,â I said, âbut Cliff actually brought up the boy.â
âWhat happened to Elliotâs parents?â Mort asked.
Seth made a face. âNo one knows anything for sure except that they abandoned their child.â
âWell, thatâs not exactly true,â I put in. âCliffâs son, Jerry, and Jerryâs wife, Marina, were archaeologists studying ancient civilizations. Donât you remember, Seth?â
âSo Cliff said. I rarely had any contact with Jerry. Wouldnât know him if I tripped over him in the street. Course, heâd be in his fifties by now.â He looked at me. âDid you know him any better?â
âNo, I didnât. I understand he met his wife in college. They had a child, and when they decided to pursue their studies in South America, they left Elliot in Cliffâs care.â
âAnd never came back,â Seth added.
âBecause they died there,â I said.
âThey were odd birds to begin with.â
âWhy do you say that, Doc?â
âBecause they were all wrapped up in their own interests, had no friends, no desire to be proper parents, let their baby run naked until the neighbors complained. Tore off to some isolated part of the world. I felt sorry for the boy, but the child protective services couldnât do anything since he was being supervised by his grandfather.â
âIâm sure the Conrad sisters were a civilizing influence,â I said. âAnd Lucy told me what a nice young man Elliot turned out to be.â
âAbsolute miracle,â Seth said.
âI hate to be a spoilsport,â Mort said to Eve, âbut why does this ghost of yours, if there is one, have to be the previous owner? Why couldnât it be Cooper Junior