Read The Best American Mystery Stories 2014 for Free Online Page B

sheet.
    “Who’s Tom Ferguson? Who is he?”
    “Is that what you do?” he asked, his voice rising. “Go around calling men.”
    It was easier to ask her this than to ask her other things. To ask her if she had shaken Shelby, if she had lied about everything. Other things.
    “Yes,” she said. “I call men all day long, I go to their apartments. I leave my daughter in the car, especially if it’s very hot. I sneak up their apartment stairs.”
    She had her hand on her chest, was moving it there, watching him.
    “You should feel how much I want them by the time they open their doors.”
    Stop
, he said, without saying it.
    “I have my hands on their belts before they close the door behind me. I crawl onto their laps on their dirty bachelor’s sofas and do everything.”
    He started shaking his head, but she wouldn’t stop.
    “You have a baby, your body changes. You need something else. So I let them do anything. I’ve done everything.”
    Her hand was moving, touching herself. She wouldn’t stop.
    “That’s what I do while you’re at work. I wasn’t calling people on Craigslist, trying to replace your lawn mower. I wasn’t doing something for you, always for you.”
    He’d forgotten about the lawn mower, forgotten that’s what she said she’d been doing that day. Trying to get a secondhand one after he’d gotten blood blisters on both hands using it the last time. That’s what she’d said she was doing.
    “No,” she was saying, “I was calling men, making dates for sex. That’s what I do since I’ve had a baby and been at home. I don’t know how to do anything else. It’s amazing I haven’t been caught before. If only I hadn’t been caught.”
    He covered his face with his hand. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry.”
    “How could you?” she said, a strangle in her throat. She was tugging all the sheet into her hands, rolling it, pulling it off him, wringing it. “How could you?”
     
    He dreamt of Shelby that night.
    He dreamt he was wandering through the blue-dark of the house and when he got to Shelby’s room, there was no room at all and suddenly he was outside.
    The yard was frost-tipped and lonely-looking and he felt a sudden sadness. He felt suddenly like he had fallen into the loneliest place in the world and the old toolshed in the middle seemed somehow the very center of that loneliness.
    When they’d bought the house, they’d nearly torn it down— everyone said they should—but they decided they liked it, the “baby barn,” they’d called it, with its sloping roof and faded red paint.
    But it was too small for anything but a few rakes and that push lawn mower with the sagging left wheel.
    It was the only old thing about their house, the only thing left from before he was there.
    By day, it was a thing he never thought about at all anymore, didn’t notice it other than the smell sometimes coming off it after rain.
    But in the dream it seemed a living thing, neglected and pitiful.
    It came to him suddenly that the lawn mower in the shed might still be fixed, and if it were then everything would be okay and no one would need to look for lawn mowers and the thick tug of grass under his feet would not feel so heavy and all this loneliness would end.
    He put his hand on the shed’s cool, crooked handle and tugged it open.
    Instead of the lawn mower, he saw a small black sack on the floor of the shed.
    He thought to himself in the way you do in dreams,
I must have left the cuttings in here. They must be covered with mold and that must be the smell so strong it—
    Grabbing for the sack, it slipped open, and the bag itself began to come apart in his hands.
    There was the sound, the feeling of something heavy dropping to the floor of the shed.
    It was too dark to see what was slipping over his feet, tickling his ankles.
    Too dark to be sure, but it felt like the sweet floss of his daughter’s hair.
     
    He woke already sitting up. A voice was hissing in his head:
Will you look in the