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disappearances?’
    â€˜That must be it,’ said Mum, still looking very closely at the ceiling. She was obviously going to be a world expert on ceilings. ‘What shall we do?’
    This was terrible. It was the worst thing that had happened to me ever in my life. My lovable pet had been snatched. Something horrible was probably eating him right now.
    â€˜You’ve got to phone the police,’ I yelled. ‘And the army. And the RAF. They can send out helicopter gunships.’
    Just then there was a screech of tyres outside on the road. I ran to the window, hoping there might be a small crash to see – I don’t mean a bad one with blood, butjust one with maybe a dent in the bumper, or a knocked-down lamppost. All I saw was the back of a car driving away at probably about two hundred miles an hour. And something else. A friendly brown-and-black face, pushing its way through our front gate.
    â€˜Rudy’s back,’ I yelled. ‘Rudy’s back!’
    â€˜Oh,’ said Dad, ‘how nice. He must have just gone off for a walk.’
    â€˜Yippee,’ said Mum, but not in the way you usually say yippee – more in the way you’d say, ‘Guess what, my granny died.’
    Sometimes grown-ups can be quite hard to understand.
    Anyway, I ran out and hugged Rudy and then went to school.
    There was high drama at school. As soon as I got in through the school gates I could tell that Declan wasn’t in a happy mood. He was sitting on one of the benches with his head in his hands. Normally at this timehe’d be charging around the playground shouting, ‘Bananas,’ at the top of his voice. There was a group of children around him, mainly the Commando Gang, but also a few other kids who were probably hanging around in the hope that Declan would do something loony.
    â€˜What’s wrong?’ I asked.
    Declan just shook his head.
    â€˜It’s Ray Quasar.’
    That was Nicky speaking. He was one of the nice boys at school, and hardly ever called anyone names or made fun of them unless they asked for it. He was also the best at gymnastics, except for Jenny, and he could do a handstand for the whole of morning break, unless someone pushed him over, which happened quite a lot.
    â€˜What about Ray Quasar?’
    â€˜He’s vanished. Escaped or something. Declan got up this morning and he wasn’t in his tank. He’s too upset to even talk. He hasn’t shouted “Bananas” once.’
    â€˜Blimey.’
    Another victim. The pet-eater was moving on to reptiles now, and a suspect had become a victim.
    It was time for action. I found the Bare Bum Gang and called a Special Emergency Gang Meeting, to be held in the den after tea. To make sure everyone came, I said we could have two sweets each out of our sweet stash.
    I brought my biggest drawing pad and some felt tips. I also brought ten broken pencils and a pencil sharpener. And two torches, because it was beginning to get dark in the evenings. I needed all those things because I’d decided we had to have a brainstorming session. That is when you have to solve a problem and the first thing you do is write down everything that comes into your head, and then you get rid of the silly things, and what you have left is the answer.
    I brought Rudy with me and tied him up outside to guard the entrance.
    I was in charge of the pad and the pens. The broken pencils and the pencil sharpener were for Jamie, because he needed something to do while we were brainstorming. Jamie was only the fifth best in the Gang at pencil sharpening, after me, Noah, Jenny and The Moan, but he usually managed to sharpen the right end, and hardly ever shoved a pencil so far up his nose he hadto go to hospital to have it removed.
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    When we’d all finished our sweets, I began.
    â€˜Right,’ I said. ‘Now, we know that we are dealing with something very evil indeed – probably the most evil thing that has