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sort of way. Like me, she has red hair, but that’s where the similarity ends. She’s all legs and lashes, lipstick and fake tan. Rumour has it her rich husband pays for the maintenance work that such a face demands.
    ‘Right then, ‘ I say. ‘That’s me.’
    ‘Oh there was one more thing, Lisa,’ Brian says. ‘I’d forget my own head if it wasn’t screwed on. What are you doing on Saturday?’
    ‘Nothing,’ I say, without thinking. Then remember Sharon’s big night out. ‘Well nothing that can’t be put off.’
    ‘Audrey and I would love to invite you round to supper.’
    ‘Supper?’
    ‘Well I call it dinner, but you know Audrey.’ He does this sort of goofy grin.
    I do indeed know Audrey. She looks like she could chew off my leg if the mood so took her. What reason can she have for a dinner invitation?
    ‘Why me?’ I say and Brian looks surprised.
    ‘She thinks it’s about time I spent more time with my key staff. Get to know what makes them tick. And after hearing your ideas, I think she’s right. So eight for eight-thirty is what I think they say in polite company, isn’t it?’
    I nod, having used up all of my quick thinking for one day.
    ‘Bring a friend by all means, but don’t bring wine. We’ve got a cellar full. Well, it’s more of a shed, but you know what I mean.’
    For some reason, Brian sounds nervous.
    ‘Audrey will be happy with flowers. She likes white lilies.’
    ‘You have them at funerals,’ I say in a colourless voice as the walls close in.
    The phone on his desk rings, removing any lingering chance of my making an excuse.
    I let the door close and walk down the stairs, along the corridors and back to my desk without speaking to anyone.

Five

    ‘This must be the one,’ I say and squint through the windscreen of my little Fiat, as the wipers fight a losing battle against torrential rain. Were I to be a fan of symbolism, I’d say something about the awful weather offering a warning of the night ahead.
    Andy sighs.
    ‘These houses all look the bloody same, little suburban boxes stuffed with little suburban minds.’
    ‘Just how many Pinter tablets did you take before we came out?’
    ‘I’ve got a hundred better things I could be doing tonight.’
    ‘It wouldn’t be my first choice of how to spend the first weekend of the New Year. I should be on Deansgate drinking cocktails and making young boys feel uncomfortable, but we’re here now, so let’s try and make the best of it.’
    ‘Hmm,’ Andy grunts. Although he’s agreed to be my plus one for the evening, he’s going all out to make it clear it’s under sufferance and only as pay-back for my spending a night in casualty after his sexual shenanigans.
    I park up and turn off the engine.
    ‘Don’t leave me alone with her will you?’ I say.
    ‘With who?’
    ‘Don’t leave me alone with Audrey.’
    ‘I don’t know why you think she’s out to get you. All you did was throw yourself at her husband.’
    ‘I was drunk.’
    ‘Exactly! She’s not stupid. She’ll understand. Chances are you’ll escape with a flesh wound. I’ve heard she rarely leaves lasting scars.’
    I glare at Andy. Why can’t he say something a bit more supportive? Why is everything one big joke?
    ‘Get your coat,’ he says. ‘This rain isn’t looking like it plans to stop any time soon. We’ll make a dash for it.’
    We run up the path and ring the doorbell. A light flicks on inside and even through frosted glass I can tell Audrey and not Brian is on the way to welcome us. My heart sinks.
    ‘Lisa! How lovely to see you again.’ She kisses the air behind my ears and I inhale heady perfume. Her honey blonde hair is immaculate, every single strand lacquered into place, not daring to move. Her mouth twists into a smile, but her eyes remain cold, beneath arched grey eyebrows.
    ‘Come on through, you must be freezing.’
    She shakes hands with Andy and turns to lead us down the hallway, a pale pink silk caftan fluttering in her