Read That Takes Ovaries! for Free Online

dresses with spaghetti straps molded over their petite bodies. All had on six-inch stiletto heels, which they walked in effortlessly.
    This impressive ensemble was watched over by a tall, slender man wrapped in a white mink coat and white mink hat. His suit was red, and the wind blew his coat open just enough to reveal a shiny lining that perfectly matched the crimson color of the ladies’ dresses.
    Alice whispered, “Those are real hookers!”
    “And you know what that makes
him,”
I said, and we started to giggle.
    Our laughter snagged the attention of the man in mink. He moonwalked backward, came to a dead halt in front of our table, snatched off his Blues Brothers sunglasses, threw his hands in the air and sang, “Ladies!” He pulled out a chair and sat down at our table.
    Alice gathered her belongings and slid one arm into her coat. I was about to follow her lead when I noticed the women who had come in with him were seated at a nearby table, snickering at our fright. My internal defense mechanism clicked. I have never been one to be intimidated, and I wasn’t about to startnow. I touched Alice’s arm to reassure her, then addressed the gentleman: “I didn’t hear anyone ask you to sit down.”
    “I couldn’t let you ladies pass up on the opportunity to have a little chit-chat with a man such as myself.”
    What made him think that either of us wanted to talk to him, I’ll never know. But I knew from his boldness that he wasn’t going to leave just because he was asked. I decided to talk to him in a way I thought he would understand.
    “In order to have a chit-chat without an invitation, you’ll need to lay fifty dollars on the table.”
    In my peripheral vision I saw Alice’s mouth drop. I kept my main focus on the man, who also seemed a bit surprised, though he quickly recovered.
    I repeated myself in a sterner tone. “If you are going to sit here, you’ll have to lay fifty dollars on the table. Otherwise, move on.”
    “You got nerve,” he said, unmoved.
    “Yes,” I said. I pointed to his female companions, “Look, you don’t let them sit and chitchat for free. I’m not going to give you my time for nothin’, either. Now pay or go.”
    I expected him to leave, to maybe laugh and go away. Instead, he reached into his pocket, pulled out a roll of money, peeled off a fifty-dollar bill and cast it on the table. “I respect a
businesswoman,”
he said, as he casually leaned back in his chair.
    He had called my bluff.
    I picked up the money. Fearful of where my gamble might take me, I said, “That will buy you fifteen minutes of conversation, and it doesn’t have to be polite.”
    The man began waving his arms like a choir director, while he rhymed and sang words as though he had memorized lines from some horrible off-Broadway play. As I ate, I watched his fanfare of body jerks and head bobs, with his fingers flaring and snapping. Though he had an impressive command of the English language, I found him irritating, annoying, despicable. I became insulted when he told me in singsong, “If-you-can’t-comprehend-what-I-recommend,I’ll-just-back-up-and-come-again.”
    I gladly interrupted him: “Your fifteen minutes are up. Either put another fifty on the table or leave.”
    “Baby, you ain’t said nothing but a word.” With arrogance he reached for his money roll a second time and threw another fifty on the table. I put the money away and he continued his performance as if the interruption had never occurred.
    After a few more minutes I saw the cabdriver head for the counter with cash in hand. I got Alice’s attention and nodded toward the checkout and our ride. I put on my coat and picked up the check.
    “Where you think you’re going? I still got time on the clock.”
    I checked my watch. He still had six minutes left from his second fifty dollars. I smiled and said, “That just mean you won’t have to lay out the money to pay for our dinners.”
    I strolled off to pay the check,