were too many covers.
“I work with international organizations, consulting on healthcare.” I gave her a bland look. “Boring stuff.”
“No, it sounds interesting. Tell me about your job.”
I hesitated before I answered her because when I did respond to her question it would be a lie. And there would be nothing but more lies to follow. Lying came easy to me, too easy in fact. But I didn’t want to this time, didn’t want to look this beautiful girl in her eyes and tell her an untruth.
Smiling, she leaned forward, propping her chin on her hands. “Well?”
The space around my heart ached and my throat went dry. But I took a deep breath and a quick gulp of my drink before speaking. “Nothing to tell really. Lots of traveling. I work with organizations like the UN and USAID to resolve global healthcare crises.” I shrugged humbly. “I’m not the ones vaccinating children or handing out bags of rice or anything. I’m usually on my laptop, analyzing trends and predicting when and where the next crisis will happen, so we can already have workers on the ground.”
“That sounds so cool.” Her eyes filled with admiration. “You’re saving the world in your own way.”
No, I’m actually killing bad guys, so the world will be a little bit safer. The problem though, is that bad guys are like roaches. You kill one and another pops up. It’s a Band-Aid for a gunshot, really. There are systemic issues, policies, organizations, structures in place that facilitate the rise of these guys. There are usually supposed good guys helping them. It’s only when they get too big for their britches that a hit is placed on them. And a guy like me is called in to put him down.
A guy like me.
“How about we order some dinner now? You’ve got to be starving.”
* * * * *
After dinner and a few more drinks, we moved to the outdoor dance floor. A reggae band played against the sound of the ocean waves crashing against the shore.
I led Rain to the dance floor, brought her close and we began moving to the music. The beat was slow, like a heart just about to give out. The woman singing had a deep, husky voice that unfurled around the dancers. The small dance floor was packed, the mood was sensuous with everyone coupled up, arms wrapped around tightly and barely swaying to the music.
Rain’s arms looped around my neck. My hands rested lightly on the small of her back. She felt so good, so soft against my body, and she smelled sweet and sexy, like violets and honey. I closed my eyes, never wanting the moment to end. We gently swayed to the rhythm without talking. No words were necessary.
Luke and The Group could go to hell. I could this make work, a relationship with her. I had excellent instincts about people honed from years of having to read people correctly the first time or die. She was the one for me. She could stop the darkness from completely taking me over. I just needed to be with her, to see her, to experience her honesty, her sweetness.
And in return, I couldn’t break her heart. I couldn’t hurt her. I couldn’t show her that other side of me. Because once she saw it, once she knew, she’d run screaming from me.
I just had to lie to her. Lie to her about my job, who I was and what I did for a living. Had to make sure the two never mixed. And then, there was my truth. The part of me that was darker and more dangerous than being a killer of bad men.
There would have to be so many lies, so many half-truths. Would it even be worth it? I inhaled the scent of her hair and closed my eyes. Yes, it was worth it. Even if I could only spend minutes or hours with her. That was minutes and hours out of the darkness. When I was with her, I was good.
I felt her pull back and look at me with her sweet golden eyes. She touched my cheek lightly, dragged her fingers in circles. “You’re so quiet. So intense. What are you thinking about?”
I could tell her nothing of my deepest thoughts. Exhaling, I focused on her
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