Surfeit of Lampreys

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Book: Read Surfeit of Lampreys for Free Online
Authors: Ngaio Marsh
Patch hurled herself onto the arm of Robin’s chair, and Frid stood in an elegant attitude before the fire, and Lord Charles wandered vaguely about the room.
    â€œDear me,” said Henry, “I feel like Uriah Heep. It’s as good as the chiming of old bells to see Robin Grey in the flesh.”
    The twins murmured agreeably and Colin said: “You haven’t grown much.”
    â€œI know,” said Roberta. “I’m a pygmy.”
    â€œA nice pygmy,” said Charlot.
    â€œDo you think she’s pretty?” asked Frid. “I do.”
    â€œNot exactly pretty,” said Stephen. “I’d call her attractive.”
    â€œReally!” said Lord Charles mildly. “Does Robin, who I must say looks delightful, enjoy a public dissection of her charms?”
    â€œYes,” said Roberta. “From the family, I do.”
    â€œOf course she does,” shouted Patch, dealing Roberta a violent buffet across the shoulders.
    â€œWhat do you think of me ?” asked Frid, striking an attitude. “Aren’t I quite, quite lovely?”
    â€œDon’t tell her she is,” said Colin. “The girl’s a nymphomaniac.”
    â€œDarling!” murmured Lady Charles.
    â€œMy dear Colin,” said his father, “it really would be a good idea if you stick to the words you understand.”
    â€œWell,” Frid reasoned, “you may thank your lucky stars I am so lovely. After all, looks go a long way on the stage. I may have to keep you all, and in the near future, too.”
    â€œApropos,” said Henry, “I fancy there’s a bum downstairs, chaps.”
    â€œOh no !” cried the Lampreys.
    â€œThe signs are ominous. I told Stamford you were out, Daddy.”
    â€œThen I suppose I’d better stay in,” muttered Lord Charles. “Who can it be this time? Not Smith & Weekly’s again, surely? I wrote them an admirable letter explaining that—”
    â€œCircumstances over which we had no control,” suggested Stephen.
    â€œI put it better than that, Stephen.”
    â€œMike,” said Lady Charles, “be an angel and run out on the landing. If you see a little man—”
    â€œIn a bowler,” said Henry and Frid.
    â€œYes, of course in a bowler. If you see him, don’t say anything but just come and tell Mummy, darling, will you?”
    â€œRighto,” said Mike politely. “Is he a bum, Mummy?”
    â€œWe think so but it’s nothing to worry about. Do hurry, Mikey darling.”
    Mike grinned disarmingly and began to hop out of the room on one leg.
    â€œI can hop for miles,” he said.
    â€œWell, run quietly for a change.”
    Mike gave a Red-Indian call and began to crawl out. The twins rose in a menacing fashion. He uttered a shrill yelp and ran.
    â€œIsn’t he heaven?” Lady Charles asked Roberta.
    â€œThere’s the lift!” Colin ejaculated.
    â€œIt’ll only be Mike t-taking a run down and up,” said Stephen. “I understand that Mike’s playing with the lift is rather unpopular.”
    â€œI bet it’s the bum,” said Colin. “Has Baskett been warned? I mean he may just lavishly show him in.”
    â€œIf Baskett doesn’t know a bailiff’s man,” said Lord Charles warmly, “after having lived with us for fifteen years, he is a stupider fellow than I take him for.”
    â€œThere’s the bell!” cried Lady Charles.
    â€œIt’s all right,” said Henry. “It’ll only be Robin’s luggage.”
    â€œThank heaven! Robin darling, you’d like to see your room, wouldn’t you? Frid, darling, show Robin her room. It’s too tiny and absurd, darling, but you won’t mind, will you? Actually it was meant for a hall, but Mike and Patch turned it into a sort of railway-station so we’re delighted to have it made sane again. I really must dress myself but I can’t

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