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powers are nothing compared to ours. Now get up and get dressed. Your father is waiting downstairs in the car.”
    I gave her my most apologetic smile. “Gee, I’d love to help save Jack and the pristine Marchette reputation,”— not —“but I’ve got a schedule full of clients.” An even bigger not.
    I wasn’t spiking my sister-in-law’s tea with Yaz. For one thing, Jack and Mandy’s baby plans were none of my business. Two? I actually liked Mandy. And three, I wasn’t climbing out of bed in my birthday suit even if my mother had seen it all before.
    She hadn’t seen it in a good 488 years. Nor had she seen the heart-shaped tattoo I’d had done the day before I’d lost my virginity and stopped aging. It wasn’t the greatest tat (think small wagon, a vial full of henna and an ancient gypsy rather than a state-of-the-art shop, sterilized needles and an Ed Hardy wannabe), but it was mine and it summed up my romantic personality.
    “Why don’t you take Nina and Rob?” I suggested. When my mother didn’t look the least bit excited over the prospect, I added, “Nina was just saying tome last night how anxious she is to get to know you.”
    “That’s ridiculous. We’ve known each other for ages.” My mother picked at another piece of nonexistent lint. “She grew up with you.”
    “You know her as the BFF of your one and only beautiful, vivacious, über hot daughter. You don’t know her as the potential mother of your first grandchild. There’s a huge difference.”
    That got her attention. She nailed me with a pointed stare. “What are you talking about?”
    I shrugged, gathered the sheet tighter and wiggled my way toward the edge of the bed. “Just that she’s a born vampire and Rob is a born vampire and things have been going pretty great between them. The next logical step is for them to move in together. Maybe open a joint bank account. And maybe, you know, possibly pledge their eternal commitment to each other.”
    Actually, the next logical step for Nina was to dump Rob, because her longest relationship to date was just under six weeks and she had a huge fear of waking up one evening and feeling as if her afterlife had passed her by while she’d been stuck having sex with the same vampire.
    Likewise, Rob usually jumped ship just after seven weeks, or right before the Moe’s Memorial Day Dinner Under the Stars, whichever came first.
    What, you might ask, is the MMDDUS? Take onelush Connecticut estate, add a fireworks display, an all-you-can-eat chicken wing buffet (for the humans) and at least three dozen Hooters girls (for the vampires), and you get the picture.
    Rob had a thing for orange shorts, as did every other male vampire on the Moe’s payroll. Hence his sudden need to be single and a total jerk-off when May rolled around.
    Until then …
    “They’re definitely getting serious.” I nodded. “Commitment vials, matching coffins, monogrammed blood bags—the works.”
    She looked like one of Satan’s hounds who’d just caught a whiff of a runaway soul. “I suppose we could make a detour by Rob’s.” Before I could blink, I heard my apartment door open and close and, poof, she was gone.
    I hurried to the door, threw the deadbolt and turned to glare at Killer, who sat curled up on the sofa.
    “You could have warned me when she got here.”
    What do I look like? A watch dog? I don’t do loyalty or protection or any of that crap. I’m a cat, i.e., snotty, selfish and hungry. He blinked. Speaking of which, if I don’t hear the can opener in the next five seconds, things are going to get ugly.
    “I’m trading you in for a cocker spaniel.”
    Yeah, yeah. And I’m the next Miss Congeniality. Get moving, sister.
    I glared and then headed to the kitchen. I know, I know. I should let him starve. But I needed all thegood luck I could get and I had a feeling animal cruelty wouldn’t score me any brownie points with the CEV Upstairs. Unless I was sucking said animal dry.
    I