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Labour, or that party whose name keeps changing? Should I be—hn hm—sick of the moon or over the parrot?”
    At this, all the neighbors nodded to one another. “ Very eccentric,” the lady from Number 27 said as they all went away.
    Simon and Marcia led Chair Person toward the Community Hall trying to explain that it was a party for Caring Society Children. “And we’re supposed to be helping,” Marcia said. “So do you think you could try to behave like a proper person for once?”
    â€œYou—hn hm—didn’t have to say that !” Chair Person said. His feelings were hurt. He followed them into the hall in silence.
    The hall was quite nicely decorated with bunches of balloons and full of children. Simon and Marcia knew most of the children from school. They were surprised they needed caring for, most of them seemed just ordinary children. But the thing they looked at mostly was the long table at the other end of the room. It had a white cloth on it. Much of it was covered with food: jellies, cakes, crisps, and big bottles of Coke. But at one end was the pile of prizes, with the green teddy on top. The conjuring set, being quite big, was at the bottom of the pile. Simon and Marcia were glad, because that would mean it would be the last prize anybody won. They would have time to look through the box.
    Auntie Christa was in the midst of the children, trying to pin someone’s torn dress. “There you are at last!” she called to Simon and Marcia. “Where are your mother and father?”
    â€œThey couldn’t come—we’re awfully sorry!” Marcia called back.
    Auntie Christa rushed out from among the children. “Couldn’t come? Why not ?” she said.
    â€œOur house has been on fire—” Simon began to explain.
    But Auntie Christa, as usual, did not listen. “I think that’s extremely thoughtless of them!” she said. “I was counting on them to run the games. Now I shall have to run them myself.”
    While they were talking, Chair Person lumbered into the crowd of children, waving his arms importantly. “Er, hn hm, welcome to the party,” he brayed. “You are all honored to have me here because I am—snuffle—Chair Person and you are only children who need caring for.”
    The children stared at him resentfully. None of them thought of themselves as needing care. “Why is he wearing football socks?” someone asked.
    Auntie Christa whirled around and stared at Chair Person. Her face went quite pale. “Why did you bring him ?” she said.
    â€œHe—er—he needs looking after,” Marcia said, rather guiltily.
    â€œHe just nearly burned our house down,” Simon tried to explain again.
    But Auntie Christa did not listen. “I shall speak to your mother very crossly indeed!” she said, and ran back among the children, clapping her hands. “Now listen, children. We are going to play a lovely game. Stand quiet while I explain the rules.”
    â€œEr, hn hm,” said Chair Person. “There appears to be a feast laid out over there. Would it snuffle trouble you if I started eating it?”
    At this, quite a number of the children called out, “Yes! Can we eat the food now?”
    Auntie Christa stamped her foot. “No, you may not ! Games come first. All of you stand in a line, and Marcia, bring those beanbags from over there.”
    Once Auntie Christa started giving orders, Chair Person became quite obedient. He did his best to join in the games. He was hopeless. If someone threw him a beanbag, he dropped it. If he threw a beanbag at someone else, it hit the wall or threatened to land in a jelly. The team he was in lost every time.
    So Auntie Christa tried team Follow My Leader, and that was even worse. Chair Person lost the team he was with and galumphed around in small circles on his own. Then he noticed that everyone was running in