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    â€œJust come back,” said Josh.
    I pursed my lips.
    â€œThe longer you leave it, the harder it’s going to get. If you came back tomorrow—”
    â€œDunno if I’m gonna come back at all.”
    â€œ What ?”
    â€œI said, I don’t know if I’m going to come back at all.”
    â€œDon’t be daft! You’ll have to, sooner or later.”
    â€œWhy?”
    â€œThey’ll make you.”
    â€œThey can’t. Not if I refuse. Not unless they drag me, and then they’d have to keep me in chains.”
    â€œThat’s ridiculous!”
    â€œNo, it isn’t.”
    â€œCourse it is! You’re being silly. They’d just take you into care, or put you in an institution, or something.”
    â€œThink that’d bother me?”
    â€œWell, it should!”
    â€œWell, it doesn’t.”
    I could see that I was exasperating him. I didn’t want to; I just didn’t seem able to stop myself. What with Indy, and now Josh, I was beginning to feel distinctly got at.
    â€œWhat about the contest?” said Josh. “They won’t let you enter if you’re not at school.”
    â€œSo?”
    â€œSo we’ve written the song! We’ve chosen your outfit. You can’t back out now!”
    If there’s one thing I really cannot stand, it’s being pushed around. Specially when I know, deep inside myself, that the person who’s doing the pushing is right. That makes me even madder than when they’re wrong. That makes me really resentful.
    I gave Josh one of my looks. I have this look which says, as plain as can be, BACK OFF. Most people, when I give them the look, immediately shut up. Josh just went motoring on, regardless. He said, “Carm, come on! You owe it to us… me and Indy. We’re rooting for you! So are loads of other people. You owe it to them, as well. You owe it to your nan!”
    I practically screamed it at him: “Don’t you bring my nan into it!”
    Still he didn’t back off. “You know what she’d say… she’d say you were letting yourself down.” I felt my face turn slowly crimson. “Letting her down, as well. Haven’t got what it takes .”
    I snarled, “You shut up!”
    â€œI won’t shut up. How can you be such a coward?”
    He had some nerve! “Talk about me being a coward! What about you? Haven’t even got the bottle to come out to your own mum and dad!”
    I shouldn’t have said it. It was mean, turning on Josh when all he was trying to do was help me.
    Stiffly, he said, “We’ve already been through that.”
    Even now I couldn’t stop myself. I snapped, “Not properly, we haven’t! All you said was you didn’t want them to know. What you actually meant was, you were too scared to tell them, and that is just pathetic . Too scared to tell your own mum and dad! Then you dare to come round here and start on at me .”
    Josh said, “I’m not starting on at you.”
    â€œWell, ha ha, that’s very funny, cos it’s certainly what it sounds like!”
    â€œYeah? Well, you know what? I wish I’d never bothered!”
    â€œYou and me both!”
    We stood there, glaring at each other. Speaking personally, if I’d been Josh I’d have walked out right there and then, but I guess Josh is a nicer person than I am. He said, “Oh look, for goodness sake, this is really stupid! If we can’t even t—”
    â€œ Go away! ” I screamed it at him. “I’m sick of being lectured, and especially by you!”
    This time, he finally got the message. I guess I’d gone just a bit too far, even for Josh. Coldly, he said, “If that’s the way you want it.”
    â€œIt is!”
    â€œOK!”
    I followed him back out into the hall and stood, simmering, waiting for him to go.
    â€œAt least I’m not bunking off school,” he