Read Somewhere on Maui (an Accidental Matchmaker Novel) for Free Online

he spotted a Visitors bracket next to a woman’s profile and realized in alarm that she could see he’d looked at her.
    He clicked back to his own profile, clenching his abs tight with horror—seventeen women had checked out his profile already.
    Dear God. He felt naked.
    Three had messaged him. “Hi. The computer thinks we’re compatible. What do you think?” said one.
    “No,” he muttered aloud, glancing over the blonde with a belly button ring that reminded him way too much of Alixia Lepler.
    “Hey, I see you’re in construction. I wouldn’t mind you checking out my specs,” said another.
    “Not up to code,” he muttered, clicking on the last one.
    “What? Can’t believe you’re on here! Say thanks to your mama for dinner!” It was Tami, luscious in her coconut bra and hula skirt outfit. The computer matched them with a 78 percent compatibility ratio, the highest he’d seen yet.
    He laughed.
    This was never going to work, so what the hell. Might as well have a little fun with it. He signed up for a Crazy Blind Date with a random companion for the following night.
     
     
    Zoe poured herself a glass of wine and started a microwave dinner of pasta and veggies, then sat down in front of her computer. It had felt good to hop in the shower and rinse off the makeup from her blind date and the sand from the beach. Comfy in a silky sleep tee and robe, she opened the document she’d started for the article on Internet dating. Her fingers flew as she threw restraint out the window and described her encounter with Lukas the dancing, big-wave-riding Brazilian bodybuilder.
    What an athlete, Zoe thought as she hunted for the right descriptions and did some research on Jaws, or Peahi, as the surf break outside of Paia was really called. Surfers came from all over the world to tow or paddle into the massive, perfectly formed waves that rolled in each winter, and Lukas appeared to have come for that and become part of Maui’s multicultural landscape.
    Lukas really did have a sweet manner and some major physical skills. Too bad he wasn’t “good with the words.”
    But wait.
    She wasn’t really dating for herself. She was dating for the article. Which meant she couldn’t ethically approach anybody since she had a fake identity. Which meant Crazy Blind Date was really the only option open to her at the moment. She could disclose the purpose of the date when and how she felt able to.
    Zoe went back onto the dating site, opened her profile—and saw that thirty-seven men had looked at it.
    Only one had messaged her. “Hi. You’re beautiful and seem like someone who wants to live life to the fullest. Have you tried the polyamorous lifestyle? Message me if you are feeling adventurous!”
    “I’m apparently not willing to live life that fully,” Zoe muttered, hitting D elete on the message. She didn’t like how the message made her feel like a prude.
    Dear God, she felt naked.
    Even though she was hiding behind fake answers, men were checking her out and finding her uninteresting. Except the weirdos. They were judging her by her food-critic, instrumental-music-loving Gemini profile.
    Well, she could give them each a dose of how that felt. Maybe that was part of the weird dating and mating ritual of the site. She clicked on each of the men who had viewed her profile, leaving evidence that she’d visited and looked at them, but not messaging or communicating. Ha. Let ’em see how it felt. Or maybe it meant something. Maybe it was part of the process, and now they’d message her… Oh God, this whole thing was way more of a mind game than she was ready for.
    She was surprised by the number of men who never showed their faces—hiding behind sunglasses or ball caps. They began to seem alike to her. She made a note for her article—could men be hiding their eyes behind sunglasses because they felt “naked” too?
    One of her profile’s visitors really caught her eye. She hit View and blew up the profile photo.
    This