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felt like ashes in her mouth.
    But Cal smiled and a spark hit her. She’d pleased him. It was still there, deep down inside, that nature of hers. It was buried under a mile of abuse and crap, but it was there. It was hers. His hand came out, the briefest of touches to help her safely to the ground, and then he let her go. He didn’t paw her, didn’t force her to his side.
    “Thank you.” That was easier.
    Finn stood to the side, obviously waiting for her to bash him. It still stung, but she could understand why he’d told Cal. She’d killed to save a friend, to save herself. What if he really did care about her? She might not deserve it, but she wasn’t stupid enough to push it away. And he couldn’t miss his kid’s birth because she was a fucked-up weirdo. “I’ll be fine, Finn. I’ll do what Cal asks me. And you’re right. I was thinking about it. I was planning it out. I was going to go to the kitchens and palm a knife. Julian made me get lasered so I wouldn’t have the excuse of shaving. And Finn took all the knives when I moved here.”
    “Because I love you.” Finn had obviously gone past his anger, and now she could see plainly that he was afraid to approach her. He’d gambled. He’d placed her safety above their friendship.
    Friendship was an act of bravery. Janine had told her that once. It was seemingly simple, but required an open heart, and that was so much harder than it sounded. It would be easier to tell him to fuck off and hide again, but she wouldn’t have done that before. She would never be the Natalie she’d been before Hawk, but she finally understood what Janine had been telling her for years. Getting back her power would take a conscious act of will. It wasn’t something that would just happen. She had to take it back. She had to decide who she wanted to be.
    She walked up to Finn and awkwardly put her arms around him. She hadn’t been that close to another human being in years, and it felt weird, but kind of nice. “Thanks for the save today, buddy.”
    He held her, softly at first, and then tight, a nice bear hug. “You bet, Nat. Kitten’s coming down with the Dawson brothers.”
    She took a deep breath and let go. “Good. I would love to see her. Kitten is pretty and sweet. Kitten will like to go to breakfast with this one.” She grinned a little. Kitten was so subby, she referred to herself in the third person.
    Finn smiled back. “You’re in for a surprise, Nat.”
    She hoped so. “Now go back to Dallas and get all daddyfied. That sounds kinkier than it should.”
    “Are you sure? I could stay and we can watch movies and just get through the night.”
    It was a sweet offer, but one she could no longer accept. “Nope. I’m going to try a little spanking tonight. Not from you, Cal. It would be weird. I’ll pick a Dom.”
    Cal’s massive shoulders slumped in relief. “Thank god. It would be like spanking my daughter, and I don’t do that. I would rather give you a time-out.”
    But sitting in a corner wouldn’t bring her the relief she needed. She had two options. She could run off and cut herself and disappoint every single person who still cared about her, or she could be brave and ask for what she needed. Her stomach turned at the second idea, but her heart hurt at the thought of the first.
    She let Cal lead her inside. Tonight she was taking a Dom. Tomorrow she had to find a killer.
    Her week was getting full.

Chapter Three
     
    Chase yawned, glancing around the dungeon. Maybe he should have stayed in Dallas until Ben got back, but he’d been brutally excited at the prospect of a mystery that didn’t involve who stole his Xbox controller. He’d been restless for months. This was the first thing that had made his blood pulse and hum, and he’d been impatient.
    So now he was here in Nowheresville, Texas, on a Friday night without even Logan to run interference for him. Kitten, apparently, needed to pack. He’d rerouted Ben’s plane so Ben could pick up