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was in eleventh grade when she met him, after a Friday night football game against the Elston Wildcats. Nick threw four touchdown passes that night, clinched the division title. Afterward, a bunch of kids went to Hot Ed’s—that was the hangout back then and that’s where he met Caroline.”
    You’re Nicky Androvich . She’d smiled, a perfect smile that lit up her heart-shaped face.
    I am . He’d stared at her, taken in by her soft voice and blue eyes.
    She’d held out her hand, so small, dainty, and he’d taken it in his own, mindless of his jammed finger and swollen knuckles. I’m Caroline Kraziak. I’m just a junior so you probably don’t know me. Her skin was so soft, like baby powder.
    You’re Norman Kraziak’s daughter , he’d said. Our father’s do business together . He’d stumbled over his next words, stuck between awe and disbelief. I… I don’t know how I never noticed you before.
    She’d laughed then, a tinkling sound that made him laugh too. How can you see anything past that flock of girls that surround you all the time?
    I want to, he’d blurted out. See you, I mean.
    Caroline had taken a step closer, her eyes shining and whispered, I want to see you, too, Nicky Androvich.
    “So Nick and Caroline started dating and then he went to college.”
    “And she wrote to him every day because she missed him so much,” Justin said.
    “That’s right.” Oh, Nicky, I can’t stand being away from you. It’s like a piece of me is missing. I love you… I love you … “Caroline went to Midtown Community College to study business and she also worked part-time as a secretary at her father’s sawmill.”
    “And she was real smart, too, wasn’t she, Dad?” Justin leaned over, peered at Nick. “Smart as you.”
    “Yeah.” He nodded. “Smart as me.” Who cares about silly old accounting? Who cares about school? She’d snuggled up next to him, buried her hand under his shirt . I just want to be your wife, Nicky, have your babies, make you happy…
    “And you got married right after you finished your first year of medical school and she moved to the city with you. Philadelphia. But you bought a house here, our house, for when you were done with school, ’cause you were coming back here to live.”
    Nick nodded, pinched the bridge of his nose. “That was the plan.” He squeezed his eyes shut, but the memories were still there, waiting. I can’t take it anymore, Nicky. I can’t. I’m afraid...all the time… of everything… can’t even go outside. … She’d covered her bulging stomach with both hands. I want to go back home, Nicky, home to Restalline .
    Six months, honey, just six more months and then we’ll go home. He’d pulled her into his arms, kissed her soft hair. Okay? Just a little longer . But it hadn’t been okay, nothing had been okay.
    “And then I was born early.”
    “And then you were born early.” Caroline, don’t you want to walk down and see the baby? He’s in the incubator, but he’s doing fine. You can put your finger through the opening and touch him? Caroline? Caroline?
    Justin smiled, inched closer to his father. “And she loved me more than anything in the world.”
    “More than anything.” He’s your son, and you’ve only been down to see him once in three days. What’s wrong with you? Can’t you walk twenty steps to the nursery to look at him? She’d been huddled on her left side, facing the wall, the white cotton blanket pulled to her chin, eyes closed. Caroline? Caroline? Her eyes fluttered open, then drifted closed. There was a bottle of pills in her bedside stand, top drawer, hidden behind a tube of hand cream. The pills had helped lull her to sleep the year before the baby, when Nick was working a lot of nights. She’d quit when she found out she was pregnant, but she hadn’t forgotten about them. He wondered how many other expectant mothers packed sleeping pills in their hospital bags.
    “And”—Justin sucked in a deep