Saturday!â now did I?â
âJust this once, Anek. I promise I wonât bother you.â
âI donât think so.â
âPlease?â
ââPleaseâ nothing, little brother. Sit at home and watch a soap with Ma or something.â
âBut why, Anek? Why canât I go with you?â
âBecause Iâm going where grown men go, thatâs why. Because last I checked, last time I saw you naked, you were far from being grown.â
âI promise I wonât bother you, Anek. Iâll just sit in a corner or something. Really. I promise. Iâll stay out of your way. Just donât leave me here with Ma tonight.â
* * *
When we were young, our mother would put on her perfume every evening before Pa came home. She would smell like jasmine, fresh-picked off a tree. Pa, he would smell of the cologne he dabbed on after he got out of the shower. Although I would never smell the ocean until we went out to Pak Nam to scatter his ashes, I knew that my father smelled like the sea. I just knew it. Anek and I would sit between them, watching some soap opera on TV, and I would inhale their scents, the scents of my parents, and imagine millions of tiny white flowers floating on the surface of a wide and green and bottomless ocean.
But those scents are lost to me now, and Iâve often wondered if, in my belated sorrow, with all my tardy regrets, Iâve imagined them all these years.
Anek finally gave in and took me. We rode out to Minburi District along the new speedway, the engine squealing beneath us. We were going so fast that my face felt stretched impossibly tight. I wanted to tell Anek to slow down but I remembered that I had promised to stay out of his way.
We were wearing our best clothes again that night, the same old outfits: Anek in his blue jeans and white polo shirt, me in my khakis and red button-down. When we walked out of the house Ma glanced up from the TV with a look that said
What are you all dressed up for?
and Anek told her he was taking me out to the new ice-skating rink, he heard it was all therage. I even said, âImagine that, Ma. Ice-skating in Bangkok,â but she just nodded, her lips a straight thin line, and went back to watching television.
ââImagine that, Maâ â¦,â Anek teased when we walked out.
âEat shit, Anek.â
âWhoa there. Be careful, little one. Donât make me change my mind.â
When we arrived at the place, it was not what I had imagined at all. I expected mirror balls and multicolored lights and loud American music and hundreds of people dancing insideâlike places Iâd seen in the district west of our neighborhood, places all the farangs frequented at night. It didnât look like that. It was only a shophouse, like the thousands of tiny two-story shophouses all over the cityâshort and common, square and concrete, in need of a new paint job. A pink neon sign blinked in the tinted window, CAFé LOVELY , it said in English. I could hear the soft, muffled sounds of upcountry music reaching across the street.
âThis is it?â
âI can take you home,â Anek said. âThatâs not a problem.â
The place smelled of mothballs. There was an old jukebox in the corner. A couple of girls in miniskirts and tank tops and heavy makeup danced and swayed with two balding, middle-aged local men. The men looked awkward with those girls in their arms, feet moving out of time, their large hands gripping the girlsâ slender waists. In a dark corner, more girlswere seated at a table, laughing. They sounded like a flock of excited birds. Iâd never seen so many girls in my life.
Three of Anekâs friends were already at a table.
âWhatâs with the baby-sitting?â one of them asked, grinning.
âSorry,â Anek said sheepishly as we sat down. âCouldnât bear to leave him home with my crazy ma.â
âYou hungry,
Cassandra Clare, Robin Wasserman