so hard at it.
But soccer was always there. We were obviously both thinking about it, but what could we say? Finally, after thethird awkward silence, Lena was the one who had the guts to bring it up. Of course. Because sheâs a better friend than me on top of everything else.
âKeezerâs a total witch,â she said. âShe was really mean in practice, yelling at everybody like they were total idiots.â
What was I going to say? Itâs too bad you made varsity as a ninth grader? All I could think to say was âWell, Ms. Beasleyâs really nice. So at least thereâs that.â
Lena just looked at me. âIâm sorry. Itâs so unfair.â
âNo, itâs not. I mean, whatâs-her-name is a senior, and they canât carry me as a backup goalie if I canât run. It makes total sense.â
âItâs not as fun without you. I donât like it as much. It used to be fun, you know, and now itâs only about winning, and who cares if itâs any fun. I had three messages from her from over the weekend. Listen to this!â
Lena whipped out her cell phone, called her voice mail, and put it on speakerphone. âItâs Saturday morning,â Keezerâs voice said out of the tinny little speaker, âand just because you canât practice with the team doesnât mean you canât practice. Make sure you run every day. Two miles is an okay number for a holiday weekend. Youâre fast, but you need to watch out for offsides. If you can get a three-on-three scrimmage together, you can practice offsides. Call me if you have questions.â
I couldnât help laughing. âDid you call?â
âI was out of range, remember? Besides, she gave me detailed instructions on all these passing and shooting drills I could run too.â
âDid you do any of this stuff?â
âI didnât get the messages until today. And anyway, itâs not like I was going to run soccer drills inside the house in New Hampshire in the rain. She needs to relax.â
âIt sure sounds like it.â
Lena went home after dinner. She had been really nice. So why did I feel so awful? I got the good coach, and she got the scary one.
Still, we were supposed to be complaining to each other about the coach, like weâd done before.
I moped around after dinner, flipping channels while Dad read, Conrad did whatever he did in his room, which is not something I want to think about, and Dominic had his nightly crying jag.
Mom came into the living room looking exasperated. âAmanda, heâs asking for you. Will you go talk to him?â
âUh, okay,â I muttered as I headed upstairs. Dominic was sitting up in his bed in his SpongeBob pajamas looking pathetic. âHey, buddy,â I said. âWhatâs up?â
âI donât want to go. Itâs too scary. Will you please stay home with me? Please?â
âHmmm . . . how many times did I make you cry this weekend?â
âI donât knowâfive or six?â
âSo basically twice a day. I donât think even a horrible teacher would make you cry that much. Itâs gonna be okay, you know? Conrad got through third grade, and youâre way smarter than him.â
âReally?â
âReally. Now try to get some sleep, okay?â
âOkay. Will you send Mommy back?â
âYou got it.â
I went back to the living room and told Mom she was wanted. âYour turn,â she told Dad. âGo tell him a story or something.â
Dadâs face lit up and he headed upstairs. When I was sure he was out of earshot, I asked Mom, âWhat, are you trying to bore the kid into submission?â
Mom gave me this amused look and said, âHe really needs to get to sleep. I figured Iâd prescribe a sleep aid.â
I continued to flip through channels, because everything on TV was annoying me. âSo,â Mom said after