Read Ruining You for Free Online Page B

Draping my arms around him, I crave the warmth and strength he
has to offer. I silently sob on his shoulder. Feeling my heart shatter over and
over again, the pain is razor blade sharp, and a million cuts shred my body.
    Raising my mouth to his ear,
I whisper, “God is punishing me for what I did. He took him from me. A life for
a life.”
    Oh. My. God. Did I just say
that out loud? I don’t even know this guy. That was one of my darkest thoughts,
and I just whispered it carelessly into the ear of a stranger.
    Pulling me closer to him, he
whispers back, “Don’t let go now, Jay. One-by-one, place each piece of your
soul back together, but this time, make it stronger. Close your eyes and do
it.”
    Listening to his words, I
will the pain to stop. I close my eyes tighter and swallow the screams that
want to burst out. I leash the torment inside that threatens to reign over me.
This time, I choose not to bury them. I mold them into something I can live with.
My eyes fly open, and I find myself staring deep into his, mere inches from my
face.
    “I don’t know a lot of
things, Jay, but I do know that God doesn’t punish. Not on this earth anyway.
That’s not his style. You are punishing yourself and using God as an excuse to
justify it. He doesn’t want you to suffer, but He’ll let you wallow in your own
sorrow if that is what you choose to do.”
    Where is this coming from?
Eli’s words burn through my mind like an inferno. For almost seventy days, I’ve
listened to Dr. Raines and her psycho-babble bullshit, but in two seconds, this
guy has made more sense to me than anything she’s said.
    Clearing my throat, I start
to speak when my name is called from the doorway. Looking up from his arms, I
see Dr. Raines standing there.
    “Jay,” Dr. Raines calls,
“you have visitors”. She is looking from Eli to me.
    Pulling away from him, I can
feel his piercing stare, but I don’t look back. I wipe the tears from my face
and grab my iPod before standing. Bowing my head, I peek at him as I kick the
toe of my slippers against the floor.
    “Uh, talk later?” I ask.
    “I’ll find you,” he says
smiling.
    I walk towards the exit,
turning back before I reach the door. He has picked up his guitar and is
playing again. Shaking my head, I turn back around and realize that my heart
feels lighter than it has in a while. Dr. Raines touches my arm once I walk out
into the hallway.
    “Jay, there are two
detectives here to see you again. They say they have some additional questions
for you. I can go in with you if you would like?”
    Not again. Why today, out of
all days, did they choose to come back? Looking at Dr. Raines, I reply, “Thank
you, but I’ll be fine.”
    “If you’re sure, Jay?
They’re in my office.”
    We both head towards her
office, but once we reach it, she leaves. When I walk in, there are two new
detectives standing, waiting for me. The first is a tall dark-skinned African
American man with a bald-head. He has kind brown eyes with a large build and
introduces himself as District Attorney Kyle Reeves. The second is a short
Asian female with inky-black hair. She also has gentle brown eyes and a slight
build. She introduces herself as Agent Morris from the Georgia Bureau of
Investigation.
    Following the introductions,
we sit down, and Mr. Reeves leans towards me. “Well, Miss James Stevenson, it’s
finally nice to meet you. I know you’ve met with the Jackson Heights police
detectives and answered their questions. That information was forwarded to us;
however, it is imperative that we speak to you directly. We have tried to give
you some privacy while you have been here, but now we are running out of time.
Do you know why we are here today?”
    “I’m sure it has something
to do with Coach Branch.” Bile rises in my throat at the mention of his name.
    “Yes, as you may know, Bruce
Branch was arrested on charges of statutory rape and released on bail. Because
this type of crime was committed by a