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for the first time that he’d changed his clothes. They covered the shredding his skin had suffered earlier so that he appeared almost untouched. He was now dressed in a flannel and jeans, which I assumed came from the vehicle on the freeway. To my shame, I actually noticed how well they fit him.
    “You didn’t have…,” he paused while plucking a tooth from his forearm and pitching it to the side. “You didn’t have enough ammo.”
    And I hadn’t. He’d done the math and been correct. I would have run out, the Infected would have overtaken us, and we would have been no more than fresh meat served right up to them. So he had thrown himself in the face of danger and once again sacrificed himself for us. That was what he’d done since the first day we spoke in the hallway at school, and it was probably what he’d do again if given the chance. I had the same screw loose so, even though it bothered me, it didn’t shock me. What I didn’t understand was why he would put a gun to his head.
    “Did you honestly believe I would willingly put a gun on you? What were you thinking?”
    He replied mildly, “That you wouldn’t do it yourself.”
    “You’re right, I wouldn’t have. I wouldn’t have pulled the trigger either.”
    We were walking back now, but he stopped sharply. When he spoke it wasn’t in anger or frustration, as I had expected. It was solemn and anxious. “You need to think about what you just said, Kennedy. Really think about it. Do you mean to tell me that if I was coming at you, baring my teeth, craving you as a food source, you wouldn’t protect yourself?”
    “No, I wouldn’t.”
    His lips dipped into a frown. “All right, the others? What if I came at the others? Doc? Mei? Beverly?”
    I cringed at the thought and my instinct to protect him above anyone else. “I still couldn’t.”
    His hands tightened into fists, but he kept his voice down. “You understand that I’d be gone, Kennedy. Gone ,” he stressed. “Lost to the virus. There would be no hope of bringing me back. The person you know me as now would no longer exist.”
    “I know that, Harrison.”
    “Our bodies are vehicles, just flesh and bone vehicles, and sometimes something else takes the driver’s seat.”
    My jaw clenched but I forced it open. “I still couldn’t do it.”
    His sigh and the drop of his head told me that I’d disillusioned him. Nonetheless, I figured it was probably for the best.
    “You do realize that out of all of us, you are the least likely to become infected? With your ability to defy infirmity or weakness, and with your heightened senses, we are way more susceptible to being caught and bitten.”
    He didn’t submit, but I saw the appreciation for my point in his expression.
    “So…,” I added, “what are you really getting at?”
    His head came up and I got the feeling that I’d caught him doing something he didn’t want me to figure out.
    He hesitated, making me think I was going to get an honest answer, but he turned to begin walking again. He didn’t get far, spinning around and taking me by surprise. I thought he was going to launch into an argument. His sudden gestures definitely seemed to be going in that direction, so I tipped my chin up and readied myself for it. But he caught me off guard when he wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me close. I lost track of what we’d been talking about instantly. The feel of his thighs against mine actually numbed my thought process. Before he spoke again, all I sensed was his smell—of fresh water and earth—exactly how I remembered him back at school.
    “You’re important to me,” he stated bluntly. Then he opened his mouth to add something, shook his head to clear his thoughts, and appeared agitated. This was just before he leaned forward to place his lips on mine.
    I had been kissed before. I had even done the kissing. I had even kissed Harrison once. It was a kiss far too quick and meant to determine if he could transmit the