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just... You don’t want
to be around Bill when he’s drinking.”
    “Thanks, Eddy,” I said
seriously. “That’s good to know. I’ll be careful. Thanks for being
my guardian angel.” I began to drift reluctantly toward the office.
“Guess I’d better get to work.” I raised an eyebrow at him. “Then
you could go back to playing the piano,” I hinted heavily.
    He laughed. “I could,
indeed.”
    The merry sound of the
piano waltzed me into his tiny office.
    At twelve-fifteen, I
was just putting away the books when a movement from the open
doorway caught my eye. I glanced up and chuckled at the sight of a
disembodied hand holding a big burger and home-cut fries on a
generous platter.
    Eddy’s smiling face
popped into the doorway above it. “Can I tempt you?”
    “Eddy, you can tempt me
any day, any time. Thanks!” I rummaged in my waist pouch for
cash.
    “On the house,” he
demurred.
    “No, I can’t. You’re
always feeding me.” I pushed a twenty at him, but he backed
away.
    “No, really. A customer
ordered it and then changed his mind. I can’t legally sell it to
you.”
    I regarded him for a
moment. “Okay. Thanks, Eddy.” I returned his grin and bit into the
hot, juicy burger. He was a lousy liar, but I didn’t see how I
could tell him that. If the man wanted to feed me enough to lie
about it, who was I to argue?
    I finished my excellent
lunch and stepped out into the bar, soaking up the classic blues
from the sound system. Eddy was occupied with filling glasses at
the bar, and I returned his jaunty wave as I left.
    I stepped into Up &
Coming on the dot of one o’clock, feeling as though life was worth
living after all. Amazing what some good food and good music will
do. I recoiled theatrically at the sight of the huge black silicone
penis on display at the front of the shop.
    “Lola!” I called. “You
left Big John the Wonder Horse out again!”
    Her smirking, wrinkled
face bounced up from behind the counter. “Hi, Aydan! I’m just
rearranging the shop.”
    I eyed her with
amusement. “Purple? I love it!”
    She ran her hands
through her spiky hair. “Yeah. I got tired of blonde. And this is
such a bright, happy colour.”
    It was. In fact, her
hair practically glowed purple. Combined with the low-cut,
body-hugging purple dress she wore, it made her look like a
wrinkled neon pixie. She stepped out from behind the counter.
    Okay, a wrinkled neon
dominatrix pixie.
    “Whoa, killer shoes,” I
kidded her. “I didn’t think they could cram that many straps and
buckles on shoes that tiny.”
    The outfit should have
been wildly inappropriate on a woman of her age, but it worked for
her. She struck a sexy pose and grinned up at me. “These are from
the same manufacturer as those thigh-high boots you tried on a
couple of weeks ago.”
    I groaned. “You mean,
the ones you forced me to try on. Don’t remind me.” I cut my eyes
at her. “You still owe me for that. That guy who peeked in the
window and saw me? I saw him on the street yesterday, and he stared
at me like I was a sideshow.”
    “Good. I’ll just tape
one of our business cards to your butt.”
    “If you do, I’ll charge
you extra for the advertising space.”
    The door chimed, and I
turned to see Linda’s smile. “Granny, I thought we agreed we’d try
to play up the lingerie and couples toys,” she chided. “I think you
should put Big John somewhere different. He’s kind of
hardcore.”
    Lola shot her an impish
grin. “I know, honey. But it’s so much fun to see folks’ faces when
they walk in.”
    “You’re hopeless.”
Linda walked over to hug her grandmother, and I chuckled at the two
diminutive women standing side by side. Lola’s outrageous outfit
and artful makeup contrasted violently with her granddaughter’s
practical nurse’s scrubs and cosmetic-free complexion, but the
family resemblance was unmistakeable.
    I shook my head at
them. “I’m going to leave you two midgets to your sordid plots.” I
headed