fingers and wondered at it. He liked having her touch him spontaneously, Judd acknowledged silentiy.
“Yes, you do. At this point in time you do.” He sighed. “Just don’t go overboard with the idea, though, because you’ll only be deluding yourself. Go back to bed, Honor. You can start talking in the [_morning. _]I really don’t think I’m up to hearing the wild tale tonight.”
“But it won’t take me long to give you a rough outline of what really happened and then you can ask questions—” she began earnestly.
“Honor, so far you’ve threatened me with a gun, attacked me physically—yes you did,” he injected when she started to protest. He touched the side of his face meaningfully. “Something tells me I’ll be wearing a few scars tomorrow. And you nearly provoked me into taking you by force. In all honesty you’ll have to admit I’ve suffered enough tonight. Let tine explanations ride until tomorrow, okay? I’m tired, even if you aren’t.”
She didn’t want to retreat to her cot, he realized. She wanted to sit there on the floor and give
him
the whole crazy tale she’d concocted. She was a determined Utile thing, he had to hand it to her.
“Bed, Honor,” he repeated levelly.
“Oh, all right” she said, scrambling to her feet “But you will listen in the morning, won’t you? With an open mind? You’ll give me a chance to explain?”
“I’ll listen. I’m making no promises beyond that” He refused to let himself offer any further comfort and as she turned back to the cot he was aware of her mixed reaction. She was depressed because she hadn’t completely gained the upper hand and relieved because at least she’d accomplished something with her fierce attack. What kind of female was he dealing with? Judd asked himself for the thousandth time.
He lay back down on the hard floor, adjusting the makeshift pillow and the tattered blanket Across the small expanse of space separating them he watched her climb back into bed and pull the covers up around her chin.
The thought that had been hovering at the back of his mind ever since he’d walked into the cantina finally came forward.
She was real.
My God, was she real, he repeated, touching the small wound on his cheek with a grimace. He had the marks to prove it now.
But for the past few days he had felt as if he were chasing down a fantasy. It had made him uneasy at first, telling everyone he met that she was his runaway wife, but gradually the fiction had seemed to cross the bounds of reality in his own mind. Every time he glanced at the photo he had wondered what it would be like to have a real claim on her, to know that when he found her he could keep her.
Loneliness had never been a problem before, Judd thought fleetingly. He’d been on his own for so long that he had a hard time imagining any other sort of life. He preferred being alone. It was natural for him now. A habit. People who lived with each other had skills he couldn’t even comprehend. They laughed together and they talked together. Flying airplanes seemed a whole lot easier and a hell of a lot less demanding. Since the day he’d gotten his license, airplanes had seemed a good substitute for the unreliable friendship of humans, especially women.
No, being alone had become a way of life and he had been stoically satisfied with his path. Until this past week when he had found himself tracking down a woman he was claiming as his wife. What would it have been like, he’d wondered, if she really had been his mate? What would it be like to have a woman who was his and his alone? Since the day he’d been left to the casual care of a series of foster homes he’d had no one he could really claim as his own. As a man he had known women but he’d never had the feeling that any of them truly belonged to him. And none had seemed anxious to claim him permanently, either.
But a strange new sensation of possessiveness had grown within him as he’d traced Honor through