Read Private Affairs for Free Online Page B

spoke.
    “I've never admitted to anything because there's nothing to admit to. I've never apologized for anything because there's nothing to apologize for. You know me. You know me!”
    I choked on a sob, tears streaming down my face as I looked at his wide eyes. His nostrils flared as he spoke, and he had a grip on me that made me feel like he was never going to let go.
    “I loved you so much, and you ruined everything!”
    I shoved him away and collapsed to the ground, my face in my hands. He sat on the ground next to me, speechless, the only sound in the parking lot my uncontrollable sobs. When I calmed a bit, he spoke, in a whisper.
    “You never let me explain, never gave me the chance to say my side of the story. You just… left me.”
    There was nothing to explain. I didn't want to sit through him trying to make up a story. My mother used to talk her way out of her misgivings, and I always forgave her- until the last time she betrayed me.
    “It's too late for us.”
    We sat in silence for a while; eventually he reached over and took my car keys.
    “I'm driving you home. You're in no condition.”
    “Wes-”
    He stood and scooped my exhausted body off the ground, carrying me to the passenger side of my car. On the ride home, we said nothing. I leaned my head against the window and closed my eyes.
    Once parked in front of my house, he handed me my keys and walked away without another word. How was he going to get home? I shook my head; it wasn't my problem. The night turned out ugly, but it was for the best- we needed to sever ties.
    “Jesus, what the hell happened to you?” Kevin asked, jumping off the couch when I entered the house.
    I shook my head and waved him away; I wasn't in the mood to talk. I kicked off my shoes and crawled into bed.
     
    The next day at work, Steven showed up during lunch time. My assistants studied him wide eyes as he walked to me.
    “You said we need to talk, and you don't respond to me when I call. What's going on?”
    With Wes showing up at my doorstep the evening before, I’d forgotten all about him. I looked over at Amira, who was all smiles as I spoke to him. To her, Steven was a keeper. I was sure he was a keeper for a lot of women. He had a high-paying job, a super sweet personality, and he was gorgeous- cinnamon brown eyes that were prettier than mine, a fit body, and an always perfectly lined up fade.
    His dark brown skin looked like smooth melted chocolate, and the brother had style for days. He was a great man; he just wasn't the man I wanted.
    The man I wanted was no good, and I knew we'd never get the future we’d always spoke about. I knew this, and I still made no attempt to move on with any other man. Why?
    Pushing other men away wasn't going to help me get over Wes; I'd been doing that for the past three years, and made no progress. There had to be men out there that were honest. And my mom would be dead in a few months; at least I wouldn't have to worry about her fucking any more of my men.
    “Let's do dinner tonight,” I said to Steven. “Something nice and romantic.”
    His eyes lit up. “Well, I didn't expect the 'we need to talk' conversation to go this way. I'll take care of everything.”
    “Don't get too ahead of yourself; it's just dinner. We'll see what happens.”
    “Yeah, yeah- casual. Got it.”
    He skipped his way out, leaving me to work.
    “Whoa, that's him?” Amira said once he left.
    I shrugged, exhaling a long sigh. “I don't know yet. But maybe I should try to find out?”
    “Absolutely! Where can I get one of those?” she said with a wink.
    I laughed. “Sounds silly, but we met on match.com.”
    “Really?”
    “That's where I meet all of my dates.”
    “Well, I need to give that a try.”
    I figured meeting someone online was safer than in person. Online profiles are scanned, and personalities are matched. That's not possible meeting someone off the street. I figured I’d have a better chance of meeting a good guy- and maybe