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when my grandparents were killed…"
    "Your mother flew home. You were six and had just started school.   Hélène came to visit and asked if you could stay with me."
    "After eloping with your fiancé?" Veronica stared at the older woman in shocked disbelief. "What a nerve."
    "Your mother wasn't short on cheek," Kathleen said with dry humour. "I was going to tell her to take a hike, but she brought you, a terrified child, dragged off by a stranger to be left with yet another stranger. It made me so angry. Your whole life had been tipped upside down. And your mother," she shook her head, "was upset that her parent's death had left her inconvenienced with you. She was a supremely selfish woman."
    Veronica digested these words in a haze of shocked disbelief. "That's so awful."  
    Kathleen's grip Veronica's hand tightened. "I was shocked and horrified. I'd known your grandparents all my life, they were such kind, generous people."
    "My best memories of Grams are her merry laugh, and even to me as a child, she was a little lady."
    "She was a little dot of a thing." Kathleen's smile was reminiscent. "Your grandfather a big strapping fellow…"
    "With a booming laugh,"   Veronica quipped and then asked, "Did my mother ever love me?"  
    "She was too much in love with herself to consider the needs of a child." Kathleen's acerbic comment came as no real surprise. "It was only supposed to be an interim measure until their next furlough."  
    It was Veronica's turn to snort. "And they promptly forgot about me."
    "Not quite," Kathleen said soberly. "They were away two more years, before they came back. Your parents arrived to collect you, ready to play at being your parents for three months, before they returned to another mission deployment in the Ivory Coast. I was furious, with them and their selfishness."
    Veronica watched the older woman frowning. "I don't remember spending any time with them?"
      "You didn't. I refused to let them uproot you again. You'd only just settled after the tragedy of losing your beloved grandparents. Hélène turned on me, accused me of wanting to keep Philip's daughter because I couldn't hold onto Philip."
    "That's so not fair," Veronica said heatedly. "Why did they ever have me if they were just going to dump me with other people?"
    "Precisely what I asked them. You didn't even know who they were, when they visited. When they first left you with me, they appointed me as your legal guardian. I contacted Social Services; they agreed and refused to allow your parents to uproot you."
    Veronica sat back on her heels, her brow puckered in a frown. Why had she never known this? "What happened?"
    "Your mother got in a real snit. She had a vicious temper when roused. They got the next plane to Africa, with the parting shot that they would contest your custody when they next returned."
    "And they never did."
    "No. Their plane was shot down over Africa." Kathleen grip on her hands tightened. "I've always felt guilty about that. But would I do the same again?" She gave a grim smile. "Definitely."  
    Veronica watched her, frowning in concentration. "And how does this affect me, now?"
    "In a way Hélène was right. I did use your father, and you, as a shield to keep other men at arm's length."
    Her words echoed in a lengthening silence.
      "And now, Veronica, you're following my example, using a married man and a child who's not yours, as a barrier between you and a fulfilling life."
     
    ~***~
     
    Professor Carey held open the door for Veronica. She stopped in mid stride when Leon stood as she entered.
    For three full days she'd told herself she didn't feel anything for him. She'd convinced herself that Kathleen was wrong. She wasn't using Leon and Jordan as shield to keep life at bay. She wasn't pining after Leon. She didn't have any feelings for him.
    But as she walked into that consulting room, she knew she lied.  
    "Why are you here?" She covered her chagrin with annoyance. She looked from Leon to the