suspicious. It also usually meant that he meant me no harm and was just yanking my chain. Of course, he knew I knew what the smile usually meant, so he might use it to lull me into a false sense of security. Or it could mean just what it seemed to. I was overthinking things and that was bad all on its own. Edward was right, I was at my best when I let my gut work and kept my higher functions in the background. Not a recipe for going through life, but a good one for a gunfight.
"We have a truce," I said.
He nodded. "I said, we did."
"You make me nervous," I said.
The smile widened. "Glad to hear you're still scared of me. I was beginning to wonder."
"The day you stop being afraid of the monsters is the day they kill you."
"And I'm a monster?" He made it a question.
"You know exactly what you are, Edward."
His eyes narrowed. "You called me Edward in front of Donna. She didn't say anything, but you are going to have to be more careful."
I nodded. "I'm sorry, I caught it, too. I will try but I'm not half as good a liar as you are. Besides, Ted is a nickname for Edward."
"Not if the full name on my driver's license is Theodore."
"Now, if I can call you Teddy, maybe I'd remember."
"Teddy is fine," he said, voice totally unchanged.
"You are a very hard man to tease, Ed ... Ted."
"Names don't mean anything, Anita. They're too easy to change."
"Is Edward really your first name?"
"It is now."
I shook my head. "I'd really like to know."
"Why?" He gazed at me from the black sunglasses, and the weight of his interest burned through the glass. The question wasn't idle. Of course, Edward seldom asked any question he didn't want an answer to.
"Because I've known you for five years, and I don't even know if your first name is real."
"It's real enough," he said.
"It bugs me not to know," I said.
"Why?" he asked again.
I shrugged and eased my hand away from my gun because it wasn't necessary, not right this minute, not today. But even as I did it, I knew there would be other days, and for the first time I really wasn't sure that both of us would see the end of my little visit. It made me sad and grumpy.
"Maybe I just want to know what name to put on the tombstone," I said.
He laughed. "Confidence is a fine trait. Over-confidence isn't." The laughter faded and left his face around the glasses cool and unreadable. I didn't have to see his eyes to know they were cold and distant as winter skies.
I pushed away from the car, hands empty at my sides. "Look, Edward, Ted, whatever the hell you call yourself, I don't like being invited here to play monster bait, and find you dating the new age mom of the year. It's thrown me, and I don't like that either. We have a truce until the case is solved, then what?"
"Then we'll see," he said.
"You couldn't just agree to stop being engaged to Donna?"
"No." His voice was small, careful.
"Why not?" I asked.
"I'd need to give her a good enough reason to break her heart and the kids'. Remember, I've been spending a lot of time with the kids. How would it look to just vanish on them?"
"I think her son wouldn't mind. Peter, wasn't it? I think he'd love it if Ted would vanish."
Edward turned his head to one side. "Yeah, Peter would love it, but what about Becca? I've been in her life for over two years and she's only six. Donna trusts me to pick her up after school. I drive her once a week to dance lessons so Donna doesn't have to close the shop early." His voice and face never changed as he spoke, as if it was just facts and meant nothing.
Anger tightened my shoulders and traveled down my arms. I put my hands in fists just to have something to do with my body. "You bastard."
"Maybe," he said, "but be careful what you ask me to do, Anita. Just walking out could do more damage than the truth."
I stared at him, trying to see behind that blank face. "Have you thought about telling Donna the truth?"
"No."
"Damn you."
"Do you really think she could handle the truth, the entire truth,