Read Not Ready To Fall for Free Online Page B

get over her after that night. I usually just ended up working late and winding up at the bar. We were quickly becoming strangers. I knew she'd gone out a couple of times with different guys because she'd post pictures on her social media. Those usually resulted in the closest thing to me getting a wrath or ending up broken. If I weren't so dead set in my ways, I would go to her and grovel, but that wasn't my style. At least not yet. I needed to clear my head.
    I decided I needed to get out of here for a bit. I was going to take Zane's ashes and spread them in his favorite places. I spent two days getting stuff in order and left my best friend, Colt in charge. Packed as light as I could, just my backpack and necessities, I climbed onto my bike and took off. I headed up the coast to New Jersey. My dad's parents lived here and we'd visit in the summers. We'd always go to the boardwalk, ride the rides and get our fill of ice cream, funnel cake, and cotton candy. I missed them terribly. They both passed away about six months apart when I was a senior in high school. Zane always loved the ocean. We'd pick up girls, surf, build sandcastles, but mostly just be kids. I missed that time in my life. It was like we were so focused on growing up to do all the things that we couldn't, that it passed us by. Now, it was just me.
    Just stopping for gas, I made it up there at sunset. I took my boots off and made my way onto the beach. The boardwalk was mostly empty and it didn't have the same liveliness that I remembered. A gust of wind came off the ocean as the waves crashed at my feet. The bottom of my jeans were getting wet, but right now I didn't have a care. I closed my eyes and just listened. Taking my backpack off, I scattered some of his ashes with a heavy heart. 
    It was becoming realer that he wasn't coming back. I think in a lot of ways, I was in denial that he was gone. Even though I was the one to identify him, it still didn't seem real. Every life must end, his just ended way too soon. After I had my moment on the beach, I gathered my things and made my way back up to the bike. I tied my boots and went to look for the nearest bar.
    It didn't take me long, they were everywhere. This one looked a little less hipster than the others. I made my way inside and took a seat. A pretty brunette bartender placed a napkin in front of me.
    "Whatcha having, doll?" Her New Jersey accent was strong.
    "Bourbon, neat. Please." I took some bills out of my wallet and placed them down.
    I was thankful that it was relatively quiet in here. It was a weekday, but it was also prime season. Fall would be coming soon.
    "You okay? You look a little lost?" She asked, setting my drink down.
    Maybe some outside perspective could do me some good. Bartenders tended to make great therapists. "I've had better days. I'm Jack, by the way."
    "Jenny. And haven't we all. I've been here since one o'clock. It's dead now, but the five to ten crowd is a rowdy bunch of bastards."
    I laughed. "We used to spend a couple weeks here every summer growing up. Not a whole lot has changed."
    Wiping the bar down with a rag, she smiled. "Not really. So what brings you back?"
    "My brother died a few months back, he wanted his ashes spread across his favorite places. This was one of them."
    "I'm sorry to hear that. You're a good brother for carrying out his wishes."
    Just then my phone pinged. It was a text from Charlotte. I'm drunk. I fucking miss you. You're going to break me. Leave me in ruins. I'm afraid I'll never be able to pick up the pieces. That's why things have to be the way they are. I fucking hate everything right now, including you.
    I felt like a knife had been plunged into my heart. Where are you? Do you need me to send someone to get you home safe?
    I just got done telling you I fucking hate you and you want to send someone to come get me?
    Yes. I want to make sure you're okay. You can hate me all you want. In a lot of ways, I almost deserve it I suppose. You haven't